|The Fairly OddParents episode transcript|
|"The Same Game"|
|Airdate:||May 4, 2001|
- Chester: Hey, is the coast clear?
- AJ: It would appear to be.
- Chester: On three, ready? (Jumps out of the bush with AJ) THREE!
(A whistle sounds)
- Chester: Holy double-wide trailer! That whistle, I know that whistle!
(Timmy spins a ball around on his finger before throwing it at them)
- AJ: It's Timmy! Look out!!
- Chester: (Gets hit) OUCH!
- AJ: You got nailed! (Sees balls hovering above him) Well, this will be unpleasant. (Gets hits)
- Timmy: Ha! It's 83 to... uhh... (Whistles for the ball) what do you guys have?
- AJ: Nothing? (Gets hit again) OW!
- Timmy: Right! I win! (Spins ball on his finger again)
- Wanda: Wow, Timmy's won another game of Timmy ball.
(Cosmo and Wanda change into lawn gnomes)
- Cosmo: That's the first rule in Timmy ball: Timmy wins!
(AJ bounces on the ball while Timmy watches and Chester laughs at him)
- Wanda: I thought there were no rules in Timmy ball?
- Cosmo: Well that's the second rule!
- Chester and AJ: RUN! (Laughs and run past Cosmo and Wanda)
(Timmy chases after them before kicking the ball over a barbed wired fence with a sign posted on it labelled 'KEEP OUT')
- Chester: You can't go in there! That's Dr. Bender's yard!
(Lightning strikes over Dr. Bender's house)
- Timmy: So?
- Chester: (While AJ hides behind him) Dude, didn't you see the lightning and hear the weird music?
- AJ: And all of a sudden it's night time? (Timmy blinks at him) Don't you understand? He's a dentist, and man... HE'S A MEAN DENTIST!
(Lightning sounds again while AJ and Chester run away. Timmy sneaks inside the yard and meets up with Cosmo and Wanda disguised as gophers)
- Wanda: Wow, look at the size of this tooth! (Looks at tooth statue)
- Timmy: Hey, my ball. (Runs towards his ball and gets trapped in a pair of dentures) Ow!
- Dr. Bender: Oh hello! Is this your ball on my lawn and your ankle in my trap?
- Timmy: Uhh... uhhh...
- Dr. Bender: (Prys Timmy's mouth open) Wow! Oh gosh, my teeth are hideous!
- Timmy: May I please just have my ball back?
- Dr. Bender: Eh, what's the word I'm looking for? Uh, NO! Only boys with perfect teeth like mine can have a ball as fun as this!
- Timmy: (Gets hit by the ball) And who has teeth as good as yours?
- Dr. Bender: May I present to you and your big silly teeth my son Wendell. (Passes his son the ball) Here you go, Wendell.
- Wendell: Wow, this sure is a fun ball that's mine now! (Bounces the ball on his teeth)
- Timmy: (Cosmo and Wanda free him) Your teeth aren't so great!
- Dr. Bender: Well, Bucky the Bucktoothed Tooth Boy, that's where you're wrong! Both me and my son have perfect teeth.
- Wendell: My comb has perfect teeth.
- Dr. Bender: And even our dog is on its way to good oral perfection.
(Dr. Bender's dog chases Timmy out of the yard)
- Dr. Bender: C'mon Wendell, let's play a game of Perfect Teeth Ball! (Bounces the ball on their teeth)
(Scene changes to later that day in the Turner house. Mrs. Turner takes out a pink colored casserole out of the oven while Mr. Turner bites into a leek. Timmy checks out his teeth in his spoon. Cosmo and Wanda are disguised as salt and pepper)
- Wanda: Aww, cheer up Timmy. Why don't you just wish for another ball?
- Timmy: (Whispers) It's not about the ball. He took my stuff because he doesn't like my teeth! I don't get it.
- Cosmo: What's not to get? The silly teeth part or the not having the ball part? (Wanda looks at him displeased) I'm not agreeing with him, I'm just saying it's pretty straight forward.
- Mr. Turner: Oh son, can I have some of that salt you're whispering to?
- Timmy: Sure.
- Mr. Turner: Thanks, son! Good old healthy salt. (Shakes Cosmo on his food and his armpit)
- Cosmo: Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
- Mrs. Turner: I had just enough time when I got back home from work to make my special pink flamingo casserole! (Her casserole deflates and turns gray)
- Mr. Turner: Ugh. That casserole's gray-t! Great! Yeah! (They laugh)
- Mrs. Turner: Who wants Chinese?
- Mr. Turner: Can I add salt to it?
- Cosmo: Ow! Ow!
(Later, Timmy walks angrily into his room while Cosmo poofs in behind him with an ice pack on his head)
- Cosmo: Y'know, your dad really needs to watch his sodium intake!
- Timmy: I can't believe I'm being teased because my teeth are different than Bender's!
(Wanda poofs in. Then a pair of dentures crashes through the window with the word 'TEETH' labelled on it)
- Timmy: Teeth...
(Another pair of dentures crashes through Timmy's window with a label attached saying 'STUPID')
- Timmy: Stupid!
(Another pair of dentures crashes through Timmy's window labelled 'BIG')
- Timmy: Big?
- Dr. Bender: (From outside) You might need to put those in the correct order! (Drives off with his son on his motorbike)
- Timmy: He wouldn't be able to make fun of my teeth if everybody had the same teeth!
(Cosmo and Wanda hover nervously over the chattering teeth)
- Timmy: Hey! You guys can do that, right?
(Cosmo swats the teeth while a pair of dentures hangs off of Wanda's butt)
- Wanda: Well sure, Timmy!
- Timmy: (While cutting people out of paper) Then I wish everything and everybody in the word looked exactly the same!
(Cosmo and Wanda look nervously at each other before their wands glow. Timmy is then turned into a grey blob and the environment turned gray)
- Timmy: Hey, what happened? (Looks at himself) Hey! I'm a grey blob! Oh my gosh! (Looks out window) Everybody looks exactly the same! Gray blobs! I can't wait to see Bender's face when he sees that he's exactly like everyone else! Right guys? (Realises he's alone) Cosmo? Wanda? Guys? Uh oh.
(Cosmo and Wanda approach a random blob)
- Cosmo: Are you Timmy?
- Chet: No, I'm Chet.
- Wanda: (To another blob) Are you Timmy?
- Dominic: I'm Dominic.
- Cosmo: (To another blob) Are you Timmy?
- Chet: I just told you I'm Chet!
- Cosmo: I hate this wish. I can't tell which blob is our blob.
(Cosmo and Wanda disappear and the scene changes to a castle in Fairyworld)
- Secretary: Fairyworld. Please hold. Fairyworld. Please hold. Fairyworld. Thank you for holding.
(Fairies are appearing in the castle)
- Fairy #1: Hey, what's going on?
- Fairy #2: What happened? I was just granting my kid a wish for a pony! And now I'm here in Fairyworld.
- Fairy #3: I was just granting my kid a wish for a ducky and I'm in Fairyworld.
(They get crushed by a huge fairy)
- Cosmo: That's weird! Because we were just granting a wish that everybody in the world looked exactly the same as everybody else, and now we're in Fairy... (Fairies glare at him and Wanda) ...what?
- Wanda: Was that a bad thing?
- Jorgen: YES! (Grabs Cosmo and Wanda)
- Wanda: Oh no! It's the toughest fairy in the universe! Jorgen Von Strangle!
- Cosmo: Right now, he's doing the Von Strangling part!
- Jorgen: You two have caused a major magical fluctuation in the magic space continuum flux!
- Wanda: What's that mean?
- Jorgen: (Drops Cosmo and Wanda on the floor) Because of what you did, everyone looks exactly the same and none of the fairies can find their kids! Do you know that that's doing to the fairies?
(A random fairy starts to inflate)
- Cosmo: Oh no! Magical backup! That only happens when fairies can't grant wishes for their kids!
(The fairy bursts into confetti)
- Jorgen: Ahahahaha... I mean, poor little fairy.
- Wanda: We gotta find Timmy... (another fairy bursts) before all the fairies... (another fairy bursts) explode!
- Cosmo: (Struggles) Oh! Oh!!
- Wanda: Oh no! Cosmo!!
- Cosmo: Ah, just goofing with you, baby! Let's go!
(They poof away. Meanwhile Timmy plays with his ball in the rain)
- Gray blob: Hey there, wanna play some blob ball?
- Timmy: I only play Timmy ball.
- Gray blob: What's a Timmy? (Walks away)
- Timmy: Man, this world wreaks. (Kicks the ball into Dr. Bender's yard again. Timmy goes to fetch it)
- Dr. Bender: Oh hello! (Picks up the ball) Is this your ball on our lawn and your gray on our gray?
- Timmy: Hey Dr. Bender! Wendell! You're big gray blobs just like me! Hahahaha!
- Dr. Bender: Actually, we're the grayest and the blobbiest!
- Timmy: But everyone is exactly alike!
- Dr. Bender: That's where you're wrong, little not-that-gray boy! In fact, only blobs as gray and blobby as we are can have a gray ball as fun as this! Now beat it!
- Timmy: (Thrown over the fence) I can't believe this. Everybody in the world is exactly alike and those creeps still think they're better than everyone else! Gotta get Cosmo and Wanda to find me so I can unwish this wish! There's no time to waste! (Slowly crawls away)
- Cosmo: (To a random blob) Timmy?
- Chet: Chet.
- Wanda: (To the same blob) Timmy?
- Chet: CHET!
- Cosmo: ...now are you Timmy?
(Chet angrily walks away)
- Cosmo: (Starts to inflate) Oh no! Magical buildup!
- Wanda: I'm not falling for that one again!
- Cosmo: (Bursts into confetti) Hey, it's raining me!
- Wanda: (Sweeps Cosmo up into a jar) Oh, if I explode we'll never be able to find Timmy! (Speeds away)
- Timmy: Gotta find something that will make Cosmo and Wanda notice me! (Looks through kitchen) Gray... gray... gray...
- Mrs. Turner: What are you looking for, sweetie?
- Timmy: Do we have a marker and some paper? I need to make a poster.
- Mrs. Turner: Oh sure, hun.
- Timmy: (Draws a gray line on gray paper) Yeah, that's vibrant and noticeable...
- Mr. Turner: I'm home... and gray! How was your day, dear?
- Mrs. Turner: Gray! (Oven sounds) But I had just enough time to make my lovely gray flamingo casserole!
- Mr. Turner: That's gray-t! (They laugh)
- Timmy: Jeez. Parents may be gray blobs like everyone else but they're still their goofy selves. Which means...
(The casserole deflates into the color pink)
- Mrs. Turner: Oh no, pink! (They laugh again)
- Timmy: Mom still can't cook! That's why they're still goofy and Bender's still a jerk! I changed their outsides, not their insides! Mom, can I have your hideous pink casserole?
- Mrs. Turner: Sure!
- Timmy: There's no time to lose! (Slowly crawls away. Then he fashions the casserole into his pink hat) If I change my outside, then Cosmo and Wanda can find me! I hope. (Walks around the city) Cosmo! Wanda! It's me! With my pink hat! I'm different! Look, different!
- Dr. Bender: Hey, who's the freak with the pink on his head? Let's get him and gray him up!
- Wanda: I can't find Timmy anywhere, and... ohh, I'm starting to feel all explode-y!
(Timmy is backed into a corner, then he sees Wanda and Cosmo in the sky)
- Timmy: Cosmo! Wanda! It's me, Timmy!
- Wanda: I see a little pink dot!
- Cosmo: That's our little pink dot!
- Timmy: You found me!
- Cosmo: Of course! You stick out like a big sore pink thumb!
- Wanda: (Inflating) Uh, less talky, more wishy!
- Timmy: I wish I was different again. I wish the whole world was back to the way it was supposed to be!
(Wanda changes everything back to normal)
- Timmy: My teeth! My head! My hat! My gosh... what happened to you?
- Wanda: (As a pile of confetti) Just make another wish.
(Later, Timmy, Chester and AJ are looking bored as they sit outside Timmy's house. They all collectively sigh)
- Mrs. Turner: What's the matter, Timmy? Why aren't you and your friends hitting each other in the head with your ball?
- Timmy: Aw, that creep dentist down the street won't give me my ball back because he doesn't like my teeth.
- Mrs. Turner: Oh, really? Well let's see if we can reason with him. (Walks away and the kids follow her)
(In Dr. Bender's yard, Dr. Bender is lecturing a kid)
- Dr. Bender: Now go, other bad toothed boy, and never darken our doorway again with your horrible bite radius. (Passes Wendell a boomerang) Here's your new boomerang, Wendell.
- Wendell: Haha, this sure is a fun boomerang that's mine now. Haha! (Cleans teeth with boomerang)
- Timmy: (Whistles) Give me back my ball, Wendell!
- Wendell: What's the word I'm looking for? Oh yeah, NO! (Laughs with his father)
- Mrs. Turner: You must be Dr. Bender. And that must be Timmy's ball. May we have it back?
- Dr. Bender: In this order, right right and no, mama tooth face!
- Mrs. Turner: Well you clearly don't know the rules of Timmy ball.
- Dr. Bender and Wendell: Oh?
- Mrs. Turner: That's right. You play it like this! (Throws ball hard at Dr. Bender) You know Timmy, perfect teeth might be nice, but if they're in a mouth that's mean, then they might as well not be in the mouth at all. (Pulls the ball out of Dr. Bender's mouth along with his dentures)
- Timmy: Thanks, mom. I don't know what you just said, but it sure makes me feel better.
- Dr. Bender: My dentures! Give me back my perfect teeth! (Jumps up for his teeth)
- Mrs. Turner: Jump, c'mon! You want it? Work for it!
- Timmy: And dude, you left these at my house. (Puts chattering teeth down Wendell's pants)
- Wendell: WAAAAH! THOSE DON'T BELONG IN THERE!
- Mrs. Turner: Who wants to play Timmy ball?
- AJ, Chester and Timmy: Uh, well I...
(Each of them get hit in the head. They run away from her screaming while she bounces the ball on their heads chasing them)
- Mrs. Turner: Oh c'mon, you guys! Where's your game faces? Bring it on, meat!
- Wanda: Is there a message there?
- Cosmo: I think it's this: if you're playing Timmy ball, wear a helmet!
- Wanda: What about Wanda ball?
- Cosmo: I know that game!
- Wanda: Did you know I use a cinder block?
- Cosmo: Didn't know that... (Gets hit in the head with a cinder block) Yaaahhh! (Tries to fly away from her)
- Wanda: C'mon! Bring it on, meat! I got your game right here! Oh, is that all you got? C'mon!
(Episodes ends with Wanda chasing after Cosmo with a cinder block)