Trixie and Veronica: [to each other] Blah blah blah shopping blah blah clothes blah blah hair blah blah boy band blah blah we'll never notice you...
A.J.: Nope. I don't speak "girl".
Timmy: [watching a handheld TV] No, Roderick! Don't do it! [on the TV, a man is proposing to a woman] She'll betray you again!
Elmer: Timmy, sir, are you watching one of those dumb, girly soap operas?
Timmy: Hey, there's plenty of action on this show!
TV Announcer: We'll be back with more of the Kissy Kissy Goo Goo Romance Hour, right after this! [he blows a kiss, as does Timmy before looking at his shocked friends]
Timmy: What? I, uh, like the writing!
Trixie: [holding up a party invitation] Blah blah blah blah blah!
Timmy: Dude! What's she saying? What's she saying?
A.J.: Hang on! [takes out a device with a microphone and headphones] Let me use my "Girl to Geek" translator!
Trixie: [as A.J. turns a knob on the device] Blah blah blah blah blah! Blah blah blah... Who blah blah blah didn't blah blah blah get invited to my birthday party tomorrow? [Timmy and company raise their hands] Well, [ripping the invitation] that's everybody who's anybody!
Chester: Great. Another year, another Trixie Tang birthday party we didn't get invited to.
Timmy: Not this time. Watch this! Hi, Trixie. [puts his hand down] Blah blah blah. Blah bla-blah blah blah blah blah blah. Blah blah bla-blah blah bla-blah blah blah bla-blah. Blah blah bla-blah blah blah.
Trixie: [to Veronica] Any idea what he's saying?
Veronica: Nope! I don't speak geek!
Timmy: Too bad we can't come to your party, blah, blah, blah, blah, because I got you a blah blah really great gift!
Trixie: I heard that! [she snaps her fingers, and Veronica dismissively gives her three invitations] Here ya go, Tommy! [moves the invitations out of Timmy's reach] The party's tomorrow. And don't forget my gift! [she drops the invitations for him to catch and leaves. Veronica blows a raspberry at him and leaves]
Chester: Great lie, dude!
A.J.: He's right! You don't have a gift for Trixie.
Timmy: Yet! Now all I have to do is impress her with the right gift, and she'll never forget my name again!
Soap Actress: [on the TV] Roderick... can you ever forgive me?
Timmy: I gotta go. [leaving] Roderick! No! [fade to the Turners' house. In Timmy's room, toys and miscellanea are thrown on a pile; offscreen] I wish I knew what kinda gifts girls liked. Hey... [takes a stink bomb out from under his bed] do girls like stink bombs?
Cosmo: Well, how about dead frogs? [he makes a dead frog appear, and it falls on Wanda]
Timmy: Ugh! No! Girls don't like 'em and neither do I! [the frog lands on his face and falls to the floor]
Wanda: Sorry, sweetie. You're not thinking like a girl.
Cosmo: Ha, yeah, face it, Timmy... the only way you could think like a girl is if you wished you were one!
Timmy: Ha! Like I'd wish I was a girl! Ha ha! What a waste of a wish! [he and Cosmo start laughing]
Cosmo: Yeah, what a waste! You're right! How stupid! [irritated, Wanda zaps Timmy, making him a girl wearing girl clothes. Cosmo recoils. The girl Timmy pulls on her ponytail and her dress. She zips to a mirror and slowly touches it and brings her face up close to it, then makes a high-pitched scream]
Girl Timmy: What did you do? I didn't wish for this! [she notices she is posing flirtatiously and stops]
Wanda: Well, you said "I", "wish", and "girl".
Girl Timmy: Oh, yeah? Well... well, you know what I think?
Cosmo: Who cares what you think? You're a girl now! [laughs. Timmy imagines a unicorn, a rabbit, and a ballerina]
Girl Timmy: Hey! I think like a girl now! I can totally use my girl brain and figure out what to get Trixie for her birthday!
Cosmo: [teasingly] Oh, that's a great idea, Little Girly Girly!
Wanda: [teasingly] Can I get the door for you, ma'am? [she and Cosmo start laughing]
Cosmo: Ma'am!
Girl Timmy: No! I'm off to the mall to find something Trixie'll like. But just so you two have something to laugh at while I'm gone... [to Cosmo] I wish you were a woman [to Wanda] and you were a man!
Cosmo and Wanda: What?
Girl Timmy: You're my Godparents. No choice. [the fairies grant the wish] Congratulations! You're now Cosma and Wando!
Cosma: [gasps] What's happening? How come I suddenly know which boy bands rock out loud?
Wando: I don't know! Why am I tempted to scratch myself and not care who sees?
Girl Timmy: See ya! [leaves. Fade to the mall. Timmy looks around as she walks] Think like a girl... think like a girl... think like a... Ooo! The comic book store! Do I still like comics? Muscular guys in spandex fighting crime! Cool! Uh... right? [walks toward the store. Chester and A.J. are watching her from behind bushes]
A.J.: Are you seeing what I'm seeing?
Chester: Yeah! Dude, a girl who actually like comic books? What's up with that?
A.J.: I don't know! [as hearts appear around his head] But I'm gonna stare at her until she feels so awkward, she has to talk to me!
Chester: What? [grabbing him by the vest] A.J.! Snap out of it! No! I've lost him![screams]A.J., come back![fade to the comic book store]
Girl Timmy: Cool! Skull Squisher #3! And there's only one left! [she and someone else grab the comic book] Hey! That's mine! [as the two of them tug on the book] Let go! It's mine! Mine![the other kid loses hold of the book, and they both fall backward. Timmy laughs, then sees that the other kid, whose face had been obscured by a hat, is Trixie. Trixie sits up and recoils] Trixie Tang?
Trixie: No! I'm in here by accident! [putting the hat back on] Understand? Accident! If word gets out I like boy stuff, all my friends will think I'm weird! Please! Please keep it our secret! Girl to girl?
Girl Timmy: Well... okay...
Trixie: Deal! You're my new best friend! [she takes out a photo of Veronica and rips it in half. Cut to elsewhere in the mall]
Veronica: [wincing in pain]Ow![cut to the comic store]
Trixie: Well, you know me. Who are you?
Girl Timmy: I'm Tim...antha?
Trixie: Okay, Timantha! Meet me outside Shmookiedale's in an hour! We can mall and stuff! [Timmy is smiling. Trixie leaves]
Girl Timmy: Wow. [leaving the store] She likes boy stuff, too... [she notices Chester and A.J. staring at her. Chester looks at A.J.] Uh... hi?
A.J.: [holding up a dead frog] Dead frog?
Chester: Don't do it! It's a trap! [he tackles A.J. and the frog lands on Timmy's face]
Girl Timmy: Ugh! Boy or girl, that's still gross! [fade to Wando watching TV]
Wando: [eats part of a chili dog and burps] Are you ready yet? We were supposed to meet Timmy at the mall fifteen minutes ago! [drinks soda. Cosma appears wearing a robe and holding two dresses. She is using hot rollers and a facial mask]
Cosma: Oh! What do you think? This? Or this? Which goes better with my eyes?
Wando: Just pick something!
Cosma: Oh, I give up! [she flies into the bathroom, then shouts as she falls into the toilet offscreen] Would it kill you to leave the lid down?
Wando: Would it kill you to look before you sit? [drinks soda and burps. Fade to a beauty salon in the mall, where Trixie and Timmy are being shampooed]
Girl Timmy: Wow. This feels great!
Trixie: It's like they're scrubbing all your troubles away!
Girl Timmy: And they're showing my favorite soap opera! This place rules!
Trixie: If only I could meet a boy confident enough to admit he likes Kissy Kissy Goo Goo! I'd go out with him even if he wore a stupid pink hat. [blows on her nails]
Girl Timmy: Really? But I'll bet he'd never come in here.
Trixie: Well, he should! If boys did more girl stuff, then girls would be able to do more boy stuff!
Girl Timmy: You know what, Trixie? You're right! Come on! [she leads Trixie out of the salon]
Trixie: Where are we going?
Girl Timmy: Where girls fear to tread. [fade to an arcade. Timmy and Trixie enter]
Chester: [sniffs something and sees the girls] Girls! [the other boys in the arcade turn to see them. Timmy brings Trixie up to Elmer, A.J., and Chester]
A.J.: Dead frog?
Girl Timmy: Yuck!
Trixie: Cool! [Chester screams]
A.J.: [as Chester takes him away] No, wait!
Chester: I'm doing this for your own good! Stop resisting! Run! [fade to the boys' bathroom; boarding up the door] I don't know what's up with those girls, but we're safe in here.
A.J.: Don't you think you're overreacting?
Chester: Dude. Boys like comics, girls like dolls; boys like video games, girls like make-up. We're different! That's why we have different bathrooms! [a toilet flushes offscreen. Veronica exits a stall and notices the boys]
Veronica: Um... am I in the wrong room? [Chester screams and starts clawing at the barricade]
Chester: Nothing makes sense anymore!
A.J.: [to Veronica] Frog? [fade to outside the mall]
Girl Timmy: It was nice meeting you, Trixie!
Trixie: You know, all week, people have been asking me what I wanted for my birthday. And you've given it to me!
Girl Timmy: I have?
Trixie: You've given me a friend who likes me for who I am!
Girl Timmy: That's all you wanted for your birthday? A friend?
Trixie: Yep. Someone who isn't afraid to say "Hey, I like Kissy Kissy Goo GooandSkull Squisher." [Timmy is smiling] If you were a boy, I'd totally date you! [leaving] See you at my party! Bye!
Girl Timmy: Oh, you'll see me alright. [fade to outside the Tangs' mansion during the party. Timmy is behind a bush] Okay, it's party time. I wish I was a boy again. [the fairies grant the wish. Timmy looks at himself]
Cosma: Hey, what about us? Aren't you going to change us? Blah blah blah! Blah! Blah! [Timmy runs off. Fade to inside the mansion. Kids with presents are lined up in front of Trixie]
Chester: [as he and A.J. give Trixie presents] Happy birthday, Trixie!
Trixie: Thanks, uh... [to the bouncer] Who are they?
Bouncer: Who cares?
Trixie: Right! [the bouncer puts the presents in the lit fireplace]
Chester: [to A.J.] See? I told you firewood was the perfect gift!
Trixie: [to the bouncer] Is she here? Did you check?
Bouncer: I'm sorry. That's all the guests, Miss Tang. Nobody named Timantha is at this party.
Timmy: Happy birthday, Trixie. [she perks up]
A.J.: Timmy!
Chester: Dude, where's your gift?
Timmy: I brought a special kind of gift. Something you can't wrap up and put in a box.
A.J.: Is it a deadly germ?
Chester: A ghost?
Timmy: Nope. Even better than a deadly germ or a ghost. Trixie... Ahem... Blah let you know I like you for who you are[Trixie starts using a translator device] blah blah blah blah not for what everyone expects you to be... a friend to you. Someone who isn't afraid to say "Hey, I like Kissy Kissy Goo GooandSkull Squisher."
Trixie: Oh, my gosh... that is so sweet... [people gasp] But, uh... [Veronica and other girls are watching] that's what I have girlfriends for! Security?
Timmy: Huh? [the bouncer pulls a lever]
Trixie: Bye, Timmy Turner!
Timmy: Hey! [the floor tile he is on springs up, launching him into the air] You remembered my name! [he lands in bushes outside the mansion]
Cosma: [to Wando] Told you she'd want a gift.
Timmy: It worked! Because I treated Trixie like a person, instead of just a girl, she remembered my name!
Wando: But she catapulted you out of the party.
Timmy: Yeah, but she did it with love! And that never would have happened if you hadn't made me a girl. Thanks. [beat] but don't ever do it again!
Wando: Deal!
Timmy: I wish you guys were back to the way you were born! [the fairies grant the wish: They turn back to normal, but Cosmo has a big nose. Wanda looks at him]
Cosmo: What? This is the nose I was born with! Can't a guy do something to make himself look pretty? Blah blah? Blah! Blah blah? Blah! Blah blah!
Wanda: [to Timmy] Well, your parents don't expect you home for a few hours! What do you want to do now?
Timmy: Ah... [match cut to him being shampooed and manicured at the beauty salon] It's like they're scrubbing all my troubles away!
Salon Woman: I've never met a boy sensitive enough to walk in here by himself! I totally want you to date my daughter!
Woman: No! he should date mine!
Wanda: [as a spray can] I'm so proud of Timmy!
Cosmo: [as a hair dryer] Yeah! He finally figured out that women love sensitivity!
Wanda: Awww...
Cosmo: And if you can fake that, you're in! [shouts as Wanda sprays him]
Man on TV: I've got bad news. Roderick asked for a raise, and he's off the show... I mean, fell down an elevator shaft!
Women: Roderick, no!
Timmy: Hey, who wants to watch wrestling?
Women: We do! [Timmy changes the channel]
Wrestling Announcer: [on the TV] And Roderick has his evil twin Roderick in a toe hold!
Timmy and Women: Roderick, no! [iris out. The end title card is shown. Fade to black]
