Mr. Turner: Pencil!
Timmy: Today is bring your kid to work day at my dad's office.
Cosmo: But Timmy, you don't have a kid!

Timmy: You rented a kid?
Mr. Turner: Timmy, Timmy, Timmy. Work is a very competitive environment, I've got to put my best foot forward. Not some smelly foot with embarrassingly large teeth.

Timmy: Dad you've got to take me, I don't wanna go to school! I mean...I've always wanted to learn about the amazing world of whatever it is you do.

Mr. Turner: This is my son Timmy.
Mr. Ed Leadly: Nice to meet you, little girl. Have a pencil pop. [he shoves the pencil pop into Timmy's mouth]

Mr. Turner: But I have this, my invisible pencil! [uses it to write, then drops it] Ahh! I dropped it! It's gone, just like my dream! [falls onto the floor and starts crying]

Mr. Turner: Timmy, I heard a choir of angels! Did something good happen?
Timmy: While you were gone I invented this! A pencil that lasts forever!

Mr. Turner: Can I have pencil pop too?
Mr. Ed Leadly: No!

Mr. Ed Leadly: As they say in the pencil business, you're my number two.
Timmy: Can they call me something else?
Mr. Ed Leadly: You're vice president. You know what that means?
Timmy: I get to totally goof around all day and use the company jet to go to the mall?
Mr. Ed Leadly: No, that's my job [presses a button on a remote and a jet is flying outside the window] Your job is to fire the slackers. Starting with Timberlake.
Timmy: But that's my dad, and his name's Turner.
Mr. Ed Leadly: Fine. Turner, fire Turner.

Mr. Ed Leadly: Turner, we've got trouble. All the people who bought your stupid pencils are filng lawsuits and deaththreats against me! Ordinarily I'd ignore them, but they're pounding down the doors with their giant mishapen arms and writing some very nasty things on the company wall!

Cosmo: Hah! you don't scare me Mr. Sharpener!

Chet Ubetcha: In other news a dense forest has spread throughout Dimmsdale!
Chet Ubetcha: In other news I'm being attacked by a racoon!

Timmy: Dad, can you come into my office?

Timmy: That was terrible! I hope I dont have to fire someone else!
Mr. Ed Leadly: Turner, you've gotta fire everyone. Because of the Everleady, people only need one pencil for their whole lives so sales have plummeted. We're closing down production.
Everyone: (screaming and sobbing) We're all little jobless babies. (Sobbing more) WE HATE TIMMY.
Timmy: I've gotta fix this somehow. I wish all the everleady pencils were destroyed.

Timmy: Thanks dad! By the way, I found your invisible pencil

Mr. Turner: Good news Timmy! You can come!
Mr. Turner - Curse you invisible pencil!
Mr. Turner: Pencils!

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