|The Fairly OddParents episode transcript|
|"School's Out!: The Musical"|
|Airdate:||June 10, 2005|
(The opening and movie starts in 37 years in the past. And a train is heading towards the broken bridge)
Flunky: Oh Flooky! Up ahead! The bridge is out! We don't have much time.
Flooky: Oh, Flunky! Are you sure there's no otherway?
Flunky: I'm a clown. The only thing I'm sure of is that seltzer is funny. (Sprayed water on himself) Ha ha ha. We don't have much time. We have to save our son if we want him to carry on our super hilarious--
Flooky: And kind of creepy --
Flunky: Clown heritage!
(He opens the door)
Evel Knievel: Hey! This is my bullet!
(They take Evel out and put the baby and a picture of them in the bullet)
Baby Flappy: Papa. Mama.
(Meanwhile, with the Pixies)
Sanderson: Well, H.P., once again our 37-year anti-fun plan to take over Fairyworld has been thwarted.
H.P.: Yes, Sanderson. It seems that as long as there are Fairies on Earth, we will never get the upper hand.
Sanderson: I can't believe they're making us drive home this time.
Flunky AND Flooky: (Both) Goodbye, Flappy! We love you!!!!
(He blast Flappy and the train is almost the bridge)
Flunky and Flooky: Ahhhh!
Flunky and Flooky: I knew I should have finished law school!
(They miss the bridge, and when to another bridge)
Flunky: Didn't see that turn there.
Flooky: Me neither.
Flooky and Flunky: (but then they suddenly realized)OUR BABY!!!
Flooky: I thought you said there was no other way!
Flunky: (incredulous) I'm a CLOWN!!!
(Back with the Pixies)
Sanderson: Want to stop for a corn dog? Some nachos? Maybe a slushy?
H.P.: No. What I want is to find an unwitting human pawn. Perhaps a baby. We could take 37 years to mold it into our ultimate weapon. But what are the odds of that?
(The Pixies hit by a rocket and their car spins around and the around)
Evel Knievel: Whew! Good thing I was wearing my helmet! Ahhh! (They hit him and flies out) I'm okay.
(The Pixies found a Baby Flappy)
Baby Flappy: (GIGGLES)
H.P.: Sanderson? I think this is the beginning of a beautiful new 37-year plan...
H.P. and Sanderson: (laugh maniacally)
(At the present day, Timmy, Pooh, and the others are waiting for the clock to turn 12)
Timmy: Come on...come on....be 3:00 already! Be the first day of summer already.
A.J.: Timmy, you can't manipulate the fabric of time by staring at the clock. Time bends for no man.
Chester: Yeah, it's worth a try. [glares at the clock] Be the first day of summer already! [the hands of the clock move one minute] I did it! I am the lord of time!
Wanda: Oh, hurry up, clock! It's almost summer!
Cosmo: Yay! Summer is the time of year when we get to constantly use our magic and hang with Timmy without the annoying interruption of the educational system! (screaming) Come on already!
(Elsewhere in Pixie Inc.)
H.P.: Yes. Come on already. It's been 37 years. Now it's time to put our plan into action. And this is the year, finally, all the magic will be ours. In five...
Timmy's Mom: Three...
Timmy's Dad: Two...
(Than clock is trick 3, and Summer is just beginning and "Kids Just Being Kids" song starts)
(At City Hall)
Mr. Crocker: (getting chased by kids) It's not supposed to be my problem until September 3rd!
Mayor: Look at those kids! They're destroying my town. What do you think I should do?
Mayor: A town meeting...that's a great idea! (Later, all the adults are angry) That your worst idea ever!
(Chet Ubetcha comes in)
Chet Ubetcha: [to the kids clinging to his leg] Get off you little, I mean equally sized, [kicks the kids off of his leg] brats! I'm Chet Ubetcha, and I demand to talk to... I mean blame the Mayor for everything that's happened!
[The angry mob starts yelling angrily]
Mayor: Wait! (Exchanges sashes with Chompy) He's the mayor! I'm the goat, see? (Eats a can) I'm eating a tin can. Baa!
Timmy's Dad: How can you just sit there "baaing" when our children are injuring themselves? And, more importantly, our stuff? (a kid breaks his toaster)
Mrs. Turner: I don't speak goat, but I don't like the tone or smell of our new goat mayor!
Mr. Crocker: Isn't he technically naked?
(Parents going after the real mayor)
Mayor: What are you coming after me for?!! He's the mayor! Chompy! what are we gonna do?!
(Than it was Flappy Bob)
Adults: Flappy Bob?!?!
Flappy Bob: That's right, folks. It's me, Flappy Bob! Owner, proprietor, and chief operating officer of Flappy Bob's Learn-A-Torium. (Honks a horn and laughs crazy) [catches self] Sorry! Terribly sorry.
Timmy's Dad: Flappy bob? I always thought you were a clown!
Flappy Bob: I'm no clown... I'm the guy with the answer to all your summertime problems. (Pulls out a suitcase) Allow me to present... Camp Learn-A-Torium! A brand-new, 24 hours a day, all summer long day-care center and educational camp!
Timmy's Dad: We can't put them in the learn-a-torium all summer, can we?
Flappy Bob: Of course you can. With a major credit card. Gary? Betty?
(They come out and headed for the pianos; Ge flappy song starts)
Chet Ubetcha: You heard it here first, folks. This is Chet Ubetcha saying that starting tomorrow, every kid in Dimmsdale is to report to Flappy Bob's Camp Learn-A-Torium for the rest of the summer! (Laughing) I mean, for their own good.
Flappy Bob: (laughs crazy) Ahem. Sorry. Sorry.
(The next day, parents started putting kids in Camp Learn-A-Torium even the Turners put Timmy in here)
Timmy's Mom: Wow. For a second there, I thought the kids and their friends might not enjoy spending the summer at Camp Learn-A-Torium. And then I thought, "Who cares'?
Timmy's Dad: Right! I'll bet the kids will have a great time! And if they don't, who cares?
'Timmy's Mom and Dad': (tears their clothes off into their swimwear) Yippee! (Realized that Dad is wearing a dress, tries again into trunks) Yay! (drove off)
Flappy Bob: Have a nice summer.
(The camp turned into a prison)
(Everyone was changed into over-protective clothes and in an over-protective playground)
Gary: Everything looks safe and sound. I'll get the padded encyclopedias.
Betty: I'll get the broccoli and the funnel!
Timmy: I can't take spending the whole summer here. I've only been here 5 minutes, and I'm ready to pull my hair out! (tears some of his hair out)
Cosmo: Well, don't give it to me. I'll just cough it back up. (spits out hairball)
(Than the Pixies comes in)
Cosmo and Wanda: [Gasps] PIXIES!!
Timmy: What do you cone domes want? It's already boring enough around here!
H.P: Oh! Hi, Turner. Don't mind us, we're just enjoying the show.
Sanderson: Your misery is like going to the movies for us. Want some popcorn?
H.P.: It's unsalted and unbuttered, right?
Sanderson: And unpopped!
H.P.: You know, Turner. All your misery has one common denominator...adults.
Timmy: Yeah, What do you mean adults?
(Adults ruined everything starts to play)
(At Flappy Bob's, Bob, Gary and Betty sees kids having fun and taking over)
Gary: This is scary. Kids are ruling the earth. Hold me!
Betty: But I don't like you like that! (runs away)
Gary: But I need to be held! (Runs after her)
Flappy Bob: No. she doesn't like you like that. (Runs after them)
(Then the Pixies appeared)
Sanderson: Phase two is complete, H.P.
H.P.: It's almost as though we're finally unstoppable, Sanderson. How is it possible?
Sanderson: Must we break I down for you?
H.P.: Yes. break it down. It would be criminal if you didn't.
(The "We're Pixies" song just begin)
(The Next day at the Turner's House)
Timmy: Awesome! kids rule and adults are powerless.
Ivette Ubetcha: (on TV) I'm Ivette Ubetcha with the news. This fall is all about chocolate, and homework has been officially declared super yucky.
Timmy: (checks his watch) Which means I guess it's time for me to go to work!
Timmy: Wait a minute. I'm the president of Kid World?
Cosmo: Well, everywhere but Florida! They're still voting!
Wanda: Don't get too cocky, Timmy! Being the president is a big job!
Timmy: Big job, schmig job.
[Reporters shouting at once]
Boy Reporter: Who do you like better? (Points to two girls) Her or her?
Boy in the back: Hey. hey. I can't see!
Timmy: What do I do? what do I do?
Wanda: Whatever you want. you're in charge!
Timmy: I'm in charge.
(The song "Ten and In Charge" starts to play)
(Jorgen comes in a takes Cosmo and Wanda)
Jorgen: You have too much power!
(The song "Ten and In Charge" ended)
(At the meeting hall in Fairy World, all the fairies are being brought back)
Cosmo: Let us go! Timmy needs us!
Jorgen: No, he does not. Nor does any other child! According to Da Rules, fairies can only be assigned to children in need!
Wanda: But there are extenuating circumstances!
Cosmo: I know this is probably a bad time, but what does "extenuating" mean?
Jorgen: Oh, I am sorry. here is what it means! (blasted Cosmo and Wanda)
Cosmo: I'd rather learn by phonics.
Jorgen: I know you're upset, and also on fire, but let me explain something to you:
(Polka started to play, and The Song "The Jorgen Polka" started the play)
(In a prison, Cosmo and Wanda are chained to a wall)
Wanda: Oh, no! we're in a fairy dungeon!
Cosmo: Well, nothing left to do now except some pull-ups! (does some pull-ups). Whew! Now what you wanna do?
(Back at Timmy's Treehouse)
Timmy: Okay... Cosmo and Wanda might be gone. But everything's great! After all! I'm the president! And I get all these free pens!
(Flappy Bob comes in angry)
Flappy Bob: That's right, "President Turner"! (makes a balloon animal) Ah, circus peanuts! That's right. it's me! Did you really think you'd be able to get away with sending your kid armies to destroy Camp Learnatorium?
Timmy: Yeah! that's why we tore it down!
Timmy: And here's a commemorative pen from the bill I signed endorsing the action.
Flappy Bob: Hey, thanks - oh, darn it! That place was great!
Timmy: Dude! that place was lame!
Flappy Bob: (Gasping) it can't be lame. (Pulls out a tiny tricycle) Everything I knew about fun went into that place. (Juggles pins and goes through a flaming hoop) Oh, confetti! Sorry about that.
Timmy: No! No! that was fun!
Flappy Bob: I was taught that boring was fun, that dull was fun.
Timmy: Who would tell you that dull and boring was fun?
(The Pixies comes in)
HP: Hello, son.
Timmy: What the heck is going on here?
H.P: That's a good idea! (pulls up a slide projector) Since the days we found him in the untamed wilds of Kansas, we have been secretly watching over Flappy Bob. (scene at an orphanage) Whether he was a baby... (Scene at a woman's house) Or as a young man. We always made sure we delivered our special brand of care-giving to see that Flappy was taken care of even if he didn't know how. (Scene where Flappy just graduated) We made sure he had everything he needed to live our-- I mean, his dream. (gives him a suitcase of money and blueprints)
Flappy Bob (Past): Learn-a-Torium
H.P.: A 37-year-long dream you destroyed, Turner!
Flappy Bob: Yeah, he did destroy my dream! So, who are you, anyway? Long-lost cousins? Distant uncles? What? And what's with the floating?
H.P.: We have that kind of money.
Sanderson: Walking is for poor people.
H.P: We like to think of ourselves as your godparents.
Timmy: Oh no! That means they can grant a wish!
H.P: Godparents with the money to give you anything you want! If you just sign here. (pulls out a contract) As part of the contract, you get to make the world exactly the way you want to, All we want in return are certain merchandising rights, a few royalties, and absolute control of Fairy world.
Timmy: Oh, my gosh! I know what they're up to!
Timmy: No! You have to listen to me! I know they're the guys who've given you everything you've ever wanted and I'm just the guy who destroyed your lifelong dream, but you have to listen to me!
Timmy: Boy, that came out wrong. But I gave you the pen.
Flappy Bob: Forget it, kid. I know who my friends are, and I'm signing that contract!
(Where is the fun started to play)
Flappy Bob: Thanks for the pen.
(Soon the world began to change into Flappy Bob's dream)
Timmy: Oh, no!
(Mr. and Mrs. Turner comes out singing)
Timmy's Dad: I'm happy peppy dad!
Timmy's Mom: I'm happy peppy mom!
(Timmy started to panic)
(At the Fairy World Prison, Jorgen was questioning Wanda)
Jorgen: Don't make this any more painful than it has to be.
Wanda: Isn't there supposed to be a good cop and a bad cop?
Jorgen: We had some cutbacks. Now... do you want to stay in Fairy Jail for the rest of your fairy life? or do you want to blame Cosmo?
Jorgen: (turns to Good Cop) Please?
Jorgen: (turns to Bad Cop) Ok. good cop over. Blame Cosmo!
Wanda: Blame Cosmo?
("Floating With You" song just started to play)
Cosmo: You really are kind of naggy.
Wanda: Did you get the handcuff key?
Cosmo: Yep! Operation: Distract Jorgen with a stupid gooey love song works every time!
Jorgen: (crying) "I saw her and no other?" Oh, and that part with the fingerprints! Fingers aren't shaped like that - that is love!
Wanda: Come on. we've got to get down to earth!
Sanderson: Well, HP, Now that Flappy has given us total control over Fairy World.
Sanderson: Anyway, what do you want to do with it?
H.P.: I'm thinking dull and gray.
Sanderson: I was thinking gray and dull, but that's why you're the boss.
Cosmo: AAAH! Pixie magic!! It's sucking away all the fun!
(The rainbow bridge started to fade)
Wanda: Oh! We're never gonna make it!
Cosmo: There's still enough pretty color left for one of us to slide down the rainbow bridge. Wow! There wasn't a manly word in that sentence.
Wanda: We need a magic wand.
Binky: Oh, no! Pixie magic! (Gasping) I still have my wand. maybe I can stop this! (Cosmo takes his wand) Aah! No! (changes into a business suit)
Cosmo: (kisses Wanda)
Wanda: Oh, Cosmo.
Cosmo: (throws her onto the bridge) GO! Aah! (changes into a business suit) Wanda!
Wanda: (sliding down) Cosmo! Whee! Cosmo! (the bridge vanishes) I got to find Pooh and the others And.. I am not naggy!
(In a new version of Pixie-ized version of Fairy World)
Binky: This stinks! We can't float! we can't do magic. And this suit! I can't wear gray. I'm a fairy! (pulls out his phone)
Girl Fairy: Binky, no!
Binky: (become colorful) Look at me! I'm colorful! Colorful! (2 big pixies showed up) Aah! (They made him in his business clothes again and put shackles on his knees)
(Un-fundamentals starts to play)
The Song Ended)
H.P.: Well, Sanderson.. We've done it. One of our 37-year plans has finally given us control over all the magic.
Sanderson: Yes, HP. If this place were any less fun, it would need a librarian.
Flappy Bob: Well, floppy shoes, big red nose, I guess this is good-bye. (as he was about to throw them in the furnace he heard the villains laughing) Hey, my floating rich friends.
HP: Just think, all we had to do to beat our fairy enemies was rip a clown child away from his super-hilarious destiny and convince him that fun wasn't fun and that boring was fun.
Sanderson: You'd have to be a clown to fall for that.
HP: A really dumb clown.
(They continue to laugh)
Flappy Bob: That kid was right. They were using me. I'll show them who's a dumb clown! (puts on nose)
(At the Learn-a torium)
Timmy: Uch. I'm gonna have to do this by myself.
Wanda: Timmy! it's horrible! Pixies have taken control of Fairy World!
Timmy: Wanda! Wow! For a quarter of a second there, I thought I was in big trouble.
(2 Pixie guards started scanning the area)
Wanda: They're not letting us do anything fun!
Timmy: I know. let's make it go away. I wish the world was back to normal!
Wanda: (makes the wish but it fails) Oh no!
Wanda: Because of that pixie contract, there's nothing I can do to break the wish.
Flappy Bob: I don't know you just said that. But with the right amount of fun, anything's possible.
Timmy: Flappy bob?
Flappy Bob: That's right. Flappy bob. Ha ha ha ha! clown! (hits Timmy with a pie, a rubber chicken, sprinkle streamers, and sprayed water at him) I was a clown at birth, but those two rich guys raised me to be a boring businessman. And if there's one thing boring businessmen know, it's how to find a loophole. (Points to the loophole)
Timmy: Oh. oh, that's good!
Flappy Bob: You guys get those cone domes down here, and I'll do the rest.
Timmy: And there's only one way to do that.
Timmy: Let's get Fun!
Flappy Bob: I like fun! I'm all about the fun now! (hits Timmy with a pie, a rubber chicken, sprinkle streamers, and sprayed water at him again)
Sanderson: That's quite enough, flappy.
Flappy Bob: You lied to me. You lied to me for 37 years. You tricked me and kept me from being the super-hilarious-- if not somewhat creepy-- clown I was destined to be!
HP: Yes. yes, we did.
Sanderson: Duh. (pulls out the contract) But we have an ironclad contract.
Flappy Bob: Oh, I agree. Every word in this contract is totally binding, which is why I like to turn your attention..to this.
HP: In return for making the world what you want, yadda yadda yadda...Pixies get the power, yadda yadda, Earth will be safe and fun...
HP and Sanderson: As defined by Flappy Bob.
Flappy Bob: And guess what I define as fun now? Everything being exactly the way it's supposed to be!
Sanderson: Oh, smoof.
Timmy: You know, you probably shouldn't have sent him to law school.
HP: You might have thwarted us this time, Turner, but mark my words: Our next 37-year plan will not fail. When you're 47, you'll pay.
(Back in Fairy World, Cosmo and Jorgen are back in there regular clothes)
Cosmo: Ah! My stupid pointy hat! It's a crown again! And still not a manly word to be found. (Jorgen punches him through the ground) Wow. that was extenuatingly manly.
Timmy: Way to go, flappy. you did it! You brought fun back to Dimmsdale.
Flappy Bob: Yeah. I just wish my clown mother and clown father were here to see this.
Timmy: I'm sure wherever they are, they're proud.
Flunky and Flooky: We're so proud!
Flunky: Except, well, this spot right here! We looked everywhere there could be clowns: Fast food restaurants, the circus, that hotel we found in Vegas. We spent a lot of time in Vegas.
Flooky: 36 Years!
Flunky: They comped our room! We even checked the U.S. Congress. It was full of clowns, but none of them were fun!
Flappy Bob: Mom! Dad!
(They threw pies at each other and hugged)
Flunky: And we'll never lose you again. But if we do, let's all agree to meet in Vegas!
Timmy: You found his parents for him?
Wanda: Hey, he said he wanted everything the way it should be. Well, pixies aren't the only ones who can exploit a loophole, you know. (Cosmo appears) Cosmo!
Cosmo: Here's your wand back. Oh, you saved the day and the fun, which is weird, because normally you're the one killing it.
Wanda: Stop it, Cosmo!
Timmy: And best of all, with the villains defeated and Flappy Bob on the path to fun, that means no more Camp Learn-a-Torium, right?
(At Gary and Betty's Learn-A-Torium)
Gary: Hey there, special guests, welcome to Gary and Betty's Learn-a-Torium!
Betty: You're going to have the most fun-du-cational, edu-ca-riffic summer of your lives!
Timmy: Uh, guys? fun time?
Cosmo and Wanda: Fun time!
Cosmo: Uh, this is fun. I'll handle it. (Pulls up a stage)
(Kids Just Being Kids Reprise started to play)