[Fade in on Timmy reading a comic book in his room. Green and pink streaks fly past him, blowing him over]
Timmy: Boy trying to read comics here! [grabs Wanda]
Wanda: Fairy trying to change diaper here. [they hear Poof crying, and she zips into the fishbowl castle, splashing water on Timmy. Timmy grabs Cosmo]
Cosmo: [holding baby powder] Baby! Butt! Powder! Bye! [he zips into the castle, dropping the powder on Timmy, and screams. He screams offscreen as the bowl jumps around]
Wanda: [offscreen] Hold him, Cosmo! Please, I can't— I need your help! Come on! [she and Cosmo appear on Timmy's bed, exhausted] That's the 83rd diaper today.
Cosmo: But at least my blood-curdling screams calmed him to sleep. [poofs in Poof in bed]
Timmy: Look, you've already washed and powdered me! Before you diaper my head, why don't you take a break from the baby? Now, I know, as new parents, you'd never leave your child alone, but— [Cosmo and Wanda fly into the castle and come out in formal wear]
Wanda: I made reservations at Chez Fairee, the best restaurant in Fairy World!
Cosmo: Ooh! Then I better learn how to use a soup spoon properly. [poofs one up and starts hitting himself with it] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Timmy: What? No, not Mama Cosma! She pinches my cheeks way too hard!
Cosmo: He's right. We are a hard cheek-pinching family. Front and back.
Timmy: And I can totally take care of my sleeping fairy godbrother all by myself!
Wanda: Uh-huh. Just like you said you could take care of some other things around here. [in the room, there are dead plants and birds and a turtle that vultures are circling over]
Timmy: But I'm a whole week older now! And I can do this! And if there's a problem, hello? You're fairies. You can just poof right back here! It's almost like you'll be dining in the bathroom.
Cosmo: We're dining in the bathroom? Then I better learn how to use toilet paper. [hitting himself with it] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Wanda: Well, a nice, quiet dinner with my man does sound kinda nice.
Cosmo: Man? What man? Does your man know how to use toilet paper like me? [hitting himself with it] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Timmy: Don't worry. I won't take my eyes off Poof for one second. Check it out! [watches Poof with bulging eyes]
Wanda: All right, all right. Here's a fairy-phone to call us if anything goes wrong. [poofing up a lock on the window] Keep the windows shut, [poofing up a note reading "No TV!" on the TV] no violent TV, and don't wake him up.
Cosmo: Your mission, Timmy Turner, if you choose to accept it, is to be responsible and watch your baby godbrother. This message will self-destruct in five seconds. One... [bursts into confetti and shouts]
Timmy: Get outta here and have a great dinner, you kooky lovebirds.
Wanda: We're trusting you, Timmy, to keep an eye on Poof.
Cosmo: [turns back to normal] And I'm keeping my eye on you and this man of yours. [Wanda sighs and poofs herself and Cosmo away. Timmy turns on music that sounds like "Theme from Mission: Impossible"]
Timmy: Cool. Mission Responsible is underway! [fade to Chez Fairee]
Wanda: This is so nice. And no crying or poop. [to the maitre d'hôtel] There's no crying or poop here, is there?
Maitre D': No, we don't serve crying or poop.
Wanda: Uh, speaking of poop, maybe I'll check in on Timmy.
Cosmo: Poof is fine. He's just like me. Nothin' to worry about. Ooh, a napkin! I better learn how to use it before your man gets here. [hitting himself with it] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Wanda: I'm calling! [calls Timmy]
Timmy: [answers the call] Responsible big brother here!
Wanda: Oh, uh, did Cosmo dial the phone and hand it to me? Oh well, while I have you, do you need anything? Do you wanna wish for anything? We could poof you up something from here.
Timmy: Yes. I wish you would stop worrying and have fun with... a conga line!
Wanda: [grants the wish] Oh, that's sweet. [laughs] Okay! Call if you need anything!
Cosmo: I knew it! You're seeing a conga line of men... with poofy sleeves! [back at the house, Timmy hangs up and catches a baby bottle Poof spits out]
Timmy: Well, Poof, it's you and me. And this is a great opportunity for your big brother to teach you the finer things in life. Like goofin' off! Step one: Get cool and comfortable. [he smashes the lock with a baseball bat and opens the window. Vultures fly in] Get away, you vultures! [shoos them away] Step two: When a note says, [tosses the note out the window] "Keep the TV off", turn it on! [turns on the TV] And toss in an evil laugh for effect! [laughs evilly. On the TV, a man in a convertible uses a ramp truck to jump a train which then explodes] This is called "watching a movie you're not supposed to with the window wide open"! [Poof giggles] And Wanda thought I couldn't take care of you. Ha! I can see it now. She'll come home and say: [in Wanda's voice] "Oh, look. Poof's asleep in Timmy's arms. You're so responsible, Timmy." And Cosmo will say: [in Cosmo's voice, hitting himself] "Ow! Ow! Ow!" And I'll say: "Ha ha! Told you so!" Right, Poof? [screams. Poof is gone. Cut to Chez Fairee]
Singer: ♪ My baby's gone! Gone, gone, gone! ♪
Wanda: Not... thinking... about... Baby... Poof.
Fairy Waiter: Our specials tonight are baby back ribs with baby carrots and baby squash, and for dessert, cream poofs. [Wanda dials on her phone]
Timmy: [looking under the bed] Poof, where are you? Poof![his phone rings and he takes the call] Hey, guys, are you havin' fun? 'Cause everything's great here! Oh, look, the baby's still asleep. [snores]
Wanda: He's snoring kinda loud. Are you sure Poof's okay? [Timmy looks out the window and screams. Poof giggles as he walks on the tall framing at a construction site]
Timmy: [screams] I mean, oh, I just remembered I wanna warm up Poof's bottle for when he wakes up and everything's great! Bye! [hangs up and zips away. Cut to outside]
Mr. Turner: Can you believe it? Dinkleberg's building a 10-story addition to his house!
Mrs. Turner: An irresponsible child could get really hurt if he wandered in there.
Timmy: Yeah. Do you mind if I go over and check it out?
Mr. Turner: Have fun, son! [to his wife] Now let's watch a movie we're not supposed to with the window wide open! [they zip away. Timmy screams, runs into a crane, and brings a girder to up Poof. Poof bounces onto the girder, and Timmy moves it to another]
Timmy: Okay, Turner, just get Poof off the dangerous metal and into his crib before Cosmo and Wanda get home. [he uses a construction hoist to get to the top of the structure and runs after Poof; catching him] Gotcha! You were about to walk off, but I got you, and... [he realizes he has walked off the structure] You did walk off. But you can float, and I can't. [falls screaming into a tub of cement] Gotta wash off before... [he jumps and the cement dries] dries. [Poof giggles and turns him back to normal] Huh huh! You think that was fun? You're lucky this wasn't more dangerous. [as Poof shakes his rattle] What are you doing? [Poof poofs them to the top of another, taller construction site; reading a sign with binoculars] "Doug Dimmadome's 80 Story Hat Storage"? Can this get any more dangerous? [Poof giggles and poofs up a lion] I've gotta stop talking to that kid. [the lion roars at them, blowing them off the structure. Timmy screams. The lion lunges forward to bite him but falls off the structure doing so. Timmy and the lion fall into cement, and Timmy screams as he jumps away from the lion and the cement dries. Poof floats into his hands, and a wrecking ball knocks the two away] Okay. You've had your fun, and you're safe, and the good thing is, there's not a more dangerous construction zone in the world, and why did I just say that? [Poof giggles and poofs them to another construction site. Timmy looks down and sees the whole Earth] My own fault. [he is on a giant spherical space station made in Dark Laser's likeness. Robots are assembling the station. A sign reading "Welcome to the Death Ball!" is put up. Below them, Timmy and Poof see Dark Laser]
Dark Laser: Yes. I, Dark Laser, am nearly finished rebuilding my ultimate destructive weapon, the Death Ball. And once complete, I can destroy the Earth. Isn't that right, Flipsie? [Flipsie flips and barks; laughing] He's running up and down on my Death Ball! [Poof giggles, but Timmy covers his mouth; to robots with a picture of an entryway] No, I want the entry foyer looking scarier! Come on, people, I'm evil! [to other robots] What is that?
Designer: Your evil couch, sir?
Dark Laser: No, no, no! I want the outside evil, but inside, I want cozy, shabby chic! Bring me new color swatches! [ripping a drape off] And does this look like satin taffeta to you, people? [telekinetically pushes the robots away]
Technician: [as Timmy and Poof watch him from behind a wall] The quarkatomic power orb, sir. It's out of energy. [puts the orb in a panel. The orb glows, then beeps and stops]
Dark Laser: Oh, that's just great. [crushes the orb] Where am I gonna find an energy source strong enough to destroy the Earth now?
Timmy: [to Poof] Okay. You gotta poof that guy away. But don't let him see you. [a pipe on a rope knocks Poof into the panel, making the device glow]
Technician: Okay, now we have enough power.
Dark Laser: Swell! But where did this squishy, smelly power source come from?
Timmy: Hey, Dark Laser, what's up? Uh, can you give me my little bro back and...
Dark Laser: We meet again, Timmy Turner. But this time, I will defeat you with my triple-action light sword with glossy onyx inlay! [laughs] Inlay! [leaps up to Timmy with the sword] Look. No fingerprints. Woo, woo.
Timmy: Look! Flipsie's about to flip!
Dark Laser: [turning around] He is? Where? Where? [Timmy runs into an elevator and goes up] There he is. Seize him! But stay off the carpet! [fighter spaceships shoot at Timmy, who screams as he runs away and slides into a crane, which he uses to smash the ships. Ship debris breaks through the floor Dark Laser is on] Ahh! That's Italian granite! For that, I will destroy your Earth... twice! What do you think, Flipsie? Flip once for "yes". [Flipsie flips and barks, and Dark Laser laughs, then presses a "destroy Earth" button. The panel Poof is on powers up, and a laser is pointed at Earth]
Timmy: Hey, Dork Loser!
Dark Laser: Too late, Turner, for soon your world will be gone... twice!
Timmy: No. Your world will be gone! [grabs plastic wrap and dives into a tub of cement. Cement splashes on Dark Laser, but the wrap shields Timmy]
Dark Laser: Ahh! That's Mediterranean mortar for my mantel! [as he lunges at Timmy, the cement dries around him. Timmy takes Poof]
Poof: Timmy.
Timmy: Hey, you said my name! That's really sweet! Okay, sweet time's over. I gotta destroy this place! [presses a self-destruct button]
Computer Voice: Death Ball to self-destruct in thirty... twenty-nine...
Timmy: Any time now! Poof us back! Poof us back to— [his phone rings and he takes the call] Timmy Turner.
Wanda: [on the phone] Conga line's over, coffee's done, and we're coming home. Is there anything else? [Timmy is sooty and running away from falling debris, and his clothes are torn]
Timmy: Y'know, I've been up and down these stairs, warming bottles all night, and I would love it if you could just poof us back to my room! [debris is falling toward him]
Computer Voice: Three... two...
Wanda: You got it, sport. [poofs Timmy and Poof to Timmy's room. Timmy sees the Death Ball explode and sighs with relief]
Timmy: We made it. I'm responsible! [he screams, having seen the room is a mess. Vultures circle] And I'm dead. [Poof giggles and turns the room and Timmy back to how they were before Cosmo and Wanda left, then poofs into Timmy's arms. Timmy smiles. Cosmo and Wanda appear]
Cosmo: Poof, Daddy's home, and I brought you some leftovers! [hitting himself with them] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Wanda: Well, what can I say, sweetie? You really proved yourself responsible. [the TV turns on]
TV Announcer: And tonight at 10, more on the cute floating baby and pink-hatted kid in the high-rise construction zone. [Timmy becomes shocked, and Cosmo and Wanda frown at him. Cosmo sees Wanda is crossing her arms and does the same]
Timmy: Rattle time, little bro. [Poof poofs the two of them to Death Ball debris Dark Laser is steering]
Dark Laser: Do you know where I can get a deal on some Turkish wool rugs?
Timmy: Don't talk. Just fly. [Flipsie flips and barks]
Dark Laser: [laughing] Turkish rug, Turkish rug! I can destroy the Earth again with my Death Ball! [iris out. The end title card is shown. Fade to black]
