Manic Mom-Day/Transcript

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The Fairly OddParents! episode transcript
"Manic Mom-Day"
Season	7
Episode	113A
Airdate	September 18, 2010
Transcript List

This article is a transcript of the Fairly OddParents episode "Manic Mom-Day" from Season 7, which aired on September 18, 2010.

Transcript

[Fade in on the Turners' house]

Mrs. Turner: [offscreen] Timothy Tiberius Turner, hurry up! [she is cooking pancakes, ironing, and vacuuming at once] The school bus will be here any minute! [Timmy is racing in a video game on the living room TV]

Wanda: [offscreen] Timmy! [appears in the game] Timmy, your mom's calling you.

Timmy: Hang on. I'm about to beat Gator Lady in Alien Hillbilly Death Race 2000. [Gator Lady growls at him. Spikes come out of a wheel on her car and drill into a wheel on Timmy's car, Cosmo]

Cosmo: No! Your middle name is Tiberius? [he spins out of control and hits a wall, sending a screaming Timmy flying out of the TV screen]

Mrs. Turner: Timmy, you look like you've been run over by alien hillbillies. Now catch your breakfast. [pours pancakes off her head and onto a plate in Timmy's hands] My day is tough enough without you getting blown up. [leaves]

Timmy: Her day is tough? Ha!

Wanda: [powdering Poof's buttocks] Aw, sport, your mother is just very busy. It's not easy being a mom. [Poof flies out of his onesie]

Timmy: Compared to my life, it sure is. [he starts eating pancakes as Wanda chases Poof with a diaper] Mom has no idea what I go through every day. Bullies beat me. Teachers fail me. It's way easier being a mom than a ten-year-old.

Wanda: [offscreen] Oh, come on, Poof! ... Just come for Mama!

Timmy: Bullies beat me. Teachers fail me. [a magical flash comes from offscreen. Poof bounces away from a charred Wanda] It's way easier being a mom than a ten-year-old.

Wanda: Care to put your money where your mouth is? [catches Poof; putting the diaper on him] Or are you too chicken? [Poof briefly turns into a gorilla and giggles as he pounds her against the ground]

Poof: Poof poof!

Timmy: I'd totally bet you. I just don't have any money 'cause I'm a kid. [licks the plate. Wanda imitates a chicken] That lame attempt at a chicken noise is not gonna work on... [Wanda clucks louder] You're on!

Cosmo: All right, a bet! [turns back to normal] Timmy has to be his mom for a whole day, and his mom has to be Timmy! Ooh! I know. If Timmy wins, Wanda has to live as a chicken for a whole week!

Timmy: I like it.

Wanda: But if Timmy doesn't succeed as Mom for a whole day, he gets no magic for a week.

Timmy: What?! [Wanda clucks] Deal! [shakes hands with Wanda]

[Cut to the kitchen]

Mrs. Turner: I just can't seem to get through to Timmy. Maybe this book on parenting written by Mr. Crocker's mom can help me deal with him. How to Raise Your Child So He Doesn't Turn Out Like Mine. [reading] Chapter one. "To understand your child, visualize his point of view." [closing her eyes] I am Timmy. I am Timmy. I am Timmy. [Wanda switches her and Timmy's brains]

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Wow! I'm really good at visualizing! [Wanda poofs up a mirror in front of Timmy-as–Mrs. Turner]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Whoa. I'm actually Mom. I think I'll go do something totally Mom-like. I'm gonna yell at me. Timmy! [Cosmo and Wanda turn into shakers and Mrs. Turner comes] Good morning... "Timmy".

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Good morning... "Mom". Oh, so far, so good. [reading the book] Next step: "Visualize yourself living your child's day." [a bus stops and honks offscreen] The school bus. Perfect! I'm off to Timmy's school! I mean, my school. [goes outside]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Mom totally thinks she's me! Awesome! [on the phone] Hello, toy store. This is Timmy...'s mom. I'd like to order a bunch of video games because I've recently become an adult woman.

[Cut to the living room]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Please charge them to my adult woman credit card. [a truck leaves a big basket of toys outside] Sweet! Now I can kick back and play video games all day.

Wanda: Guess again, "Mom". [poofing a planner in front of Timmy] Read your day planner. [Timmy opens the planner and sticky notes shoot out]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Whoa! All these notes are for chores? You gotta be... [Wanda clucks] I mean, yay, chores. First up: Clean Timmy's room. Well, that's easy. I wish my room was clean!

Wanda: Aw, sorry, sport. You're Mom now, and she doesn't have fairies. Too bad, huh?

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: No worries, Wanda. I can totally clean my own room. Besides, I'm not that messy anyway.

[Cut to Timmy opening the door to his trash-filled room]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Whoa. [a tentacle from a monster in the green liquid on the floor grabs Cosmo]

Cosmo: [shouts] The trash monster's got me! Down, Mr. Squiggles! Down!

Wanda: Maybe you'd like to end the bet?

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Not a chance. Staying home and cleaning as Mom still beats being me. And speaking of beatings, I bet my mom's having fun on the bus.

[Cut to the school bus]

Francis: Turner, welcome to Chez Francis. Today's specials are the broken leg of lamb and the cracked ribs. And for dessert... pound cake.

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Oh, let me guess. You're the angry school bully. [reading the book] "When people are angry, it usually means they've had a dream crushed." Do you have a crushed dream, large gray boy?

Francis: [does a take] Well, I have always wanted to be an interpretive dancer.

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Wonderful! Let's dance right now! [they do so. A shocked AJ starts recording this with a cell phone]

Francis: I'm blossoming. I feel so free!

Francis and Mrs. Turner: [spin around] Springtime!

Kids: Springtime!

[Cut to Timmy's room]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: There. My room is finally clean. Time to relax with a comic book.

Wanda: No relaxing yet. Next up in your mom's planner: laundry and dishes.

[Cut to Timmy at a kitchen counter with stacks of dirty tableware and pans. Cosmo comes out of the filled sink and holds up a mug. The monster in the sink grabs him]

Cosmo: [holding on to a pan] Oh, not again, Mr. Squiggles! I already gave you my liver! [the monster pulls him into the sink]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Cosmo, no! [stacks of plates fall. A phone rings and Timmy answers the call] Hello?

Mr. Turner: [over the phone] Hi, honey! Boy, you sound a lot like Timmy. Eh, listen. I forgot my lunch, and I'm too busy working to go out. [watching the video of Mrs. Turner and Francis via TooYube] Man, that Timmy's a good dancer. Can you bring it to me?

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: No way! I've got a lot to— [Wanda clucks offscreen]

Mr. Turner: Ooh! Are there chickens running around the house? Fry me up one of those.

[Cut to Timmy picking up plates and pans]

Wanda: Not so easy juggling all the things a mom has to juggle, is it, sport?

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Nice try, Wanda. But I've got it all under control. [he puts plates and pans in a washing machine, which Cosmo then falls into. He pours detergent into the machine, drops the detergent jug in, and hits the machine with his hip to make it start] See? Under control. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've gotta bring lunch to my loving husband. [goes outside with a lunch bag] Now please pretend I never said that. [he, Wanda, and Poof leave. The washing machine overflows with suds]

[Cut to Dimmsdale Elementary. Mrs. Turner tiptoes into Mr. Crocker's classroom]

Mr. Crocker: Turner! F! [fires an F at Mrs. Turner]

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: You know, Mr. Crocker, [reading the book] people who are hard on others are usually even harder on themselves. Do you give yourself Fs too?

Crocker: You've been reading Mother's parenting book—the one she was too busy writing to raise me! Normally I'd give you another F for that, but suddenly I want to... tell you about my empty childhood.

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: There, there, Mr. Crocker. Why don't you dance your pain away? [they dance]

Crocker: Springtime!

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Springtime!

[Cut to downtown. There are tire tracks and destruction along roads and buildings]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: [drives through the top of a restaurant] Hang on! I gotta shake these coppers! [a drawbridge leading to Pencil Nexus starts lifting. Timmy drives up it and Cosmo and Wanda scream. Timmy crashes into Mr. Turner's office] We're here.

Mr. Turner: [sees Timmy-as–Mrs. Turner] Thanks, honey. [as Timmy gives him his lunch] I wanna show you my gratitude with a big, wet, sloppy, smoochy, European-style kiss!

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: What? [his teeth chatter as Mr. Turner puts on lip balm, sprays his mouth, licks his teeth, shaves his face, and puckers up] I wish I had an electric eel.

Cosmo: Well, you can't use magic. but lucky for you, I always keep an electric eel In my pocket for emergencies. [Timmy takes the eel and puts its mouth against Mr. Turner's. Mr. Turner gets electrocuted and lands flat on the floor, and the eel leaves]

Mr. Turner: Eh! After all these years, we still have that spark. Kiss me again! Kiss me again! [Timmy reverses out of the building and he, Cosmo, and Wanda scream and fall to the ground]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: I sure hope my mom is having as bad a day as me.

[Cut to Mrs. Turner eating lunch outside the school]

Trixie: Don't even waste a greeting, Timmy Turner. I'm never going to talk to...

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Ooh, I love your shoes!

Trixie: You do?

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Ooh, and your dress really brings out your eyes.

Trixie: Wow, tell me what else you love about me.

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Only if I can braid your gorgeous hair!

Trixie: Timmy Turner, you're wonderful.

Francis and Crocker: Springtime!

Kids: Springtime!

[Cut to the mall]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Ugh. Why are we at the mall?

Wanda: It's time for bargain hunting, sport.

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: [takes the planner from Wanda] Clothes shopping? But that's boring.

Wanda: Not the way your mom does it. [she turns into a helmet and Poof turns into shoulder pads. They land on Timmy and Cosmo appears as a shopping cart] When the whistle blows, run for the sales bins.

Cosmo: And watch out for Mrs. Hempel. She's a biter! [Mrs. Hempel growls. A referee blows a whistle, and women with shopping carts rush past Timmy, who pushes Cosmo after them]

Wanda: Go for the bargains, Timmy! Slacks at three o'clock! [Mrs. Hempel pushes Timmy and Cosmo into a cell phone booth and laughs. A bruised Timmy stops and groans] Go for new underwear, Timmy! [Timmy pushes Cosmo up an escalator and lands in a pile of shopping carts and struggling women]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: [crawls out holding socks] Got 'em!

Wanda: Those are socks.

Cosmo: Close enough. [Timmy continues pushing him] Now hurry to the checkout! [spikes come out of a wheel on Mrs. Hemple's shopping cart]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Ah! [Mrs. Hemple reaches for the socks. The monster, which is sitting in Cosmo, spins the wheel with its tentacle, and Mrs. Hemple spins out of control and hits a giant cup of soda, causing an explosion that blows up the mall and makes Timmy and the fairies shoot out]

Timmy and Cosmo: Wahoo! [a letter from the mall's facade falls on the school]

Crocker, Mrs. Turner, and Kids: Springtime! [a school bus takes Mrs. Turner away]

Crocker: That Timmy Turner is the greatest kid I've ever known. B−! [Timmy and Cosmo land in front of the house]

Wanda: Ready to admit your mom has it tougher than you?

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: No way. [the fairies turn back to normal] This day may have been crazy, but I kept it all under control. I'm an awesome mom! [water and suds pour out of the house] Oh, no. The washing machine must have overflowed. The house is ruined! [suds flood everyone]

Poof: [floating away on a bubble] Ooh. [Wanda grabs him]

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Being a mom is a total pain in the neck! Wanda, I was wr... wwwr...

Wanda: Cluck-cluck, chicken boy!

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: I was wrong. You win. Go ahead. Take away your magic for a week.

Wanda: Aw, Timmy. I'm not gonna take away my magic. I just wanted you to learn about how hard it is being a mom.

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: Well, I did. But I bet my mom had a pretty tough time being me too. [the bus pulls up and the fairies turn into bubbles. Mrs. Turner gets off the bus] Uh, hi, "Timmy". How was your day?

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Well, "Mom", I spent my day dancing and singing. I braided Trixie's hair and got a B− from Mr. Crocker.

Timmy as Mrs. Turner: [faking a smile] Gee, that sounds great.

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Are you kidding? It was terrible. Those people are bananas!

Crocker, Francis, Chester, AJ, Kids, and Bus Driver: Springtime!

Mrs. Turner as Timmy: Well, now I understand Timmy perfectly. He's so well-adjusted compared to those other kids. And that means I'm a great parent. I'm going to close my eyes again, and when I open them, I'll stop pretending to be Timmy. [closing her eyes] I'm Mom again. I'm Mom again. I'm Mom again. [Wanda switches her and Timmy's brains]

Mrs. Turner: Hey! What happened to the house?

Timmy: I'll help you clean it up, Mom.

Mrs. Turner: Oh, that's sweet, Timmy. But I've got it under control. Mom powers, activate. Shape of... a cleaning tornado. [spins like a tornado and cleans the house in seconds]

Timmy: Wow! You're, like, magic!

Mrs. Turner: Oh, that's what being a mom is all about.

Mr. Turner: Hi, honey! I'm home! How about another disturbing European-style kiss? [puckers up and sticks his tongue out]

Timmy: [to his mother] Wanna borrow the eel?

Mrs. Turner: [taking the eel from him] I've done well with you, Timmy. [goes offscreen and uses the eel]

Mr. Turner: [shouts offscreen] There's that spark.

[Iris out on Timmy's face. The end title card is shown]

Mr. Turner: [in voice-over] Europe hurts my lips!

[Fade to black]

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