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This article is a transcript of the Fairly OddParents episode "Hero Hound" from Season 9, which aired on July 7, 2014.
Script[]
(The episode begins with Sparky running into the Turner’s house, terrified. He slams the door.)
Sparky: Hide me, Timmy! There’s a monster after me!
(Timmy looks out the window and sees a white bunny.)
Timmy: Aw, there’s nothing to be afraid of, Sparky. That’s just a cute baby bunny.
Sparky: On the outside. You can’t see into its dark, twisted soul!
(He jumps into Timmy’s arms)
Timmy: You need to be a little braver. Speaking of brave dogs, Hero Hounds is on TV!
(Timmy and Sparky join Mr. Turner on the couch. Chet Ubetcha comes on TV.)
Chet Ubetcha: This is Chet Ubetcha welcoming you to Hero Hounds, a show that chronicles the true life stories of Dimmsdale’s heroic dogs!
(A collie, a poodle, and another dog hop onto the show’s title, Hero Hounds. An explosion is seen behind them.)
Mr. Turner: Ooh! Speaking of heroes, I’m gonna get a hero sandwich, with its heroic sidekick, the dill pickle!
(Mr. Turner leaves the room.)
Chet Ubetcha: Tonight’s episode features a brave little dog named Reuben.
Mr. Turner: Ooh! Now I want a Reuben Sandwich!
(On TV, we see a burning building.)
Woman on TV: Help! My baby’s trapped inside that building!
(A fire truck comes by with Reuben the collie driving. He makes it to the building and climbs the ladder up to a window. He jumps inside and comes out carrying a baby in his mouth. Reuben brings the baby back to the woman. Then, we see a plane out of control with a baby flying it.)
Woman on TV: Help! My baby can’t land his plane!
(Reuben parachutes onto the plane and runs through the door. He runs into the cockpit and removes the baby from the seat. The baby sleeps while Reuben goes to the plane’s controls. The plane lands safely at an airport. The crowd cheers for Reuben.)
Timmy: Wow! Reuben is amazing!
Sparky: Yeah? I’d like to see him go one-on-one with that monster in the garden.
(He looks out the window again.)
Sparky: Oh no! He’s teamed up with some kind of hideous beast!
(The bunny is standing next to a yellow kitten.)
Timmy: That’s a kitten!
Sparky: Face it, Timmy. I’m a big fat chicken.
(Sparky leaves.)
Mr. Turner: Ooh! Now I want a big fat chicken!
(In the kitchen, Mr. Turner is eating a sandwich when he notices Sparky, depressed.)
Mr. Turner: What’s wrong, Sparky? You look down. Hero?
(He offers Sparky the sandwich.)
Sparky: No. I’m not.
(Mr. Turner offers Sparky a huge, cooked chicken.)
Mr. Turner: Big fat chicken?
Sparky: Well, thanks for rubbing it in!
Mr. Turner: Wait a minute. I can understand you! I’m talking to a dog! Yay! I have a useful skill! I can talk to animals. I’m going to call my boss Mr. Ed Leadley and tell him!
(He runs to the phone.)
Mr. Turner: Hello? Millie? Put the big cheese on the phone. Ooh! Now I want a big cheese! Mr. Leadly, I quit! Of course, it’s for a good reason. I talk to animals now. If you can’t understand me, put your poodle on the phone!
(In Timmy’s bedroom, he’s talking to Cosmo, Wanda and Poof.)
Timmy: I’m worried about Sparky. He thinks he’s all depressed because he thinks he’s never done anything brave.
Cosmo: What are you talking about? Sparky does brave stuff all the time! He landed that plane and saved the baby!
Wanda: That wasn’t Sparky, that was Reuben!
Cosmo: Then why is Reuben depressed?
Wanda: Reuben’s not depressed! It’s Sparky.
Cosmo: Problem solved, you’re welcome! Who wants a big cheese? My treat.
(He poofs up a big cheese.)
Timmy: Guys, I bet we could cheer Sparky up if we made him feel brave. I wish Sparky had a chance to be a hero!
(A well appears in the garden. Cosmo poofs Timmy above the well. Timmy falls in.)
Wanda: Good thinking, Cosmo! Now Sparky can rescue Timmy from the well.
Cosmo: And with Timmy gone, there’s more cheese for me!
Timmy: Help! I am stuck in a well!
(Mrs. Turner comes running.)
Mrs. Turner: Oh, this is awful! Now that we have a well, our property taxes are going to go through the roof!
(Chet Ubetcha’s news van drives in. Chet runs out.)
Chet Ubetcha: This is Chet Ubetcha with tragically cliched news! A boy named Timmy has fallen down a well. In related news, the Turner’s property taxes are going through the roof. Quick! Get a shot of the roof!
(Sparky is watching the news report on TV.)
Chet Ubetcha: Time is running out! Is there anyone who can save this boy? We’ll find out after this super weird commercial.
(Mr. Turner is sitting in what looks like a morning show room.)
Mr. Turner: Do you want your cocker spaniel to become a talker spaniel? Or your seeing eye dog to become a speaking mouth dog? Well, I can help! I’m Timmy’s Dad, and I can talk to animals. Watch me have a conversation with this bloodthirsty African lion!
(A lion sits on a couch.)
Mr. Turner: Hello, what’s your name?
Lion: Roar!
Mr. Turner: Use your words.
(The lion pounces on Mr. Turner. After a brief fright, it drags Mr. Turner away. Mr. Turner is screaming all the while.)
(The screen reads “PLEASE STAND BY”. Then the TV changes back to the well.)
Timmy: Sparky! Help me!
(Poof, Cosmo and Wanda poof in.)
Wanda: Come on, Sparky. Now’s your chance to be a hero! Timmy’s in trouble and you’re the only one who can rescue him!
Sparky: You’re right, Wanda! I’m going to save Timmy - by going to China, digging a hole, and tunnelling my way up into the well!
(Sparky packs a suitcase.)
Wanda: Couldn’t you just throw down a ladder?
Sparky: There’s no time! I have to get to the airport! But first I have to get to the bookstore - I need something to read on the plane. Can I borrow ten dollars? Never mind, I’ll stop at the bank!
(He leaves.)
(Five days later, Chet and a group of people are gathered around the well. People have sings saying things like, “Hang in there!”, “We love you, Timmy!”, “Get well soon” and “Hi Mom!”)
Chet Ubetcha: This is Chet Ubetcha saying it’s day five and Timmy Turner is still stuck in that well! Boy, it’s been a slow news week.
(At the bottom of the well, Timmy just sits there, shivering. Just then, Sparky, wearing a Chinese wicker hat, appears.)
Sparky: Hi, Timmy! I’m here to rescue you! Sorry it took so long. My flight to China was delayed. Our baby pilot got lost.
Timmy: Whatever, I’m glad you’re here. Now use your fairy dog powers and float us out of here.
Sparky: There’s no time! We have to get back down to China to catch our 18-hour flight back to Dimmsdale! And airport security stinks. They search everywhere!
(Sparky picks Timmy up and takes him back down the tunnel.)
Sparky: Hope you don’t mind flying coach, Timmy. I only had enough money for one first class ticket.
(Five more days later, Chet and the group of people are still gathered around the well. The signs have changed to “My arms are tired”, “Why are we still here?”, “Forget Timmy, save us!!” and “Feed me!” A taxi pulls up. Timmy and Sparky, both wearing Chinese wicker hats, come out.)
Timmy: Hey, everyone, my dog eventually saved me from the well, he’s a hero.
(The crowd cheers. They pick up Sparky, but soon, they all collapse.)
Crowd: We haven’t eaten in ten days.
(Cosmo appears.)
Cosmo: Well, you’re not getting my big cheese!
Timmy: It’s OK. My dog got takeouts from China.
(Timmy gives the crowd a big pile of Chinese takeout containers. The crowd cheers.)
Chet Ubetcha: This is Chet Ubetcha saying this dog is a hero and I get dibs on the pork lo mien!
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OY!C ★ 1 ★ 2 ★ 3 ★ 4 ★ 5 ★ 6 ★ 7 ★ 8 ★ 9 ★ 10 | ||
#01 Fairly OddPet | #02 Dinklescouts | #03 I Dream of Cosmo |
#04 Turner & Pooch | #05 Dumbbell Curve | #06 The Terrible Twosome |
#07 App Trap | #08 Force of Nature | #09 Viral Vidiots |
#10 Scary GodCouple | #11 Two and a Half Babies | #12 Anchors Away |
#13 Finding Emo | #14 Dust Busters | #15 The Bored Identity |
#16 Country Clubbed | #17 Dog Gone | #18 Turner Back Time |
#19 Cosmonopoly | #20 Hero Hound | #21 A Boy and His Dog-Boy |
#22 Crock Blocked | #23 Weirdos on a Train | #24 Tons of Timmys |
#25 Let Sleeper Dogs Lie | #26 Cat-Astrophe | #27 Lame Ducks |
#28 A Perfect Nightmare | #29 Love at First Bark | #30 Desperate Without Housewives |
#31 Jerk of All Trades | #32 Snack Attack | #33 Turning Into Turner |
#34 The Wand That Got Away | #35 Stage Fright | #36 Gone Flushin' |
#37 Fairly Old Parent | #38 School of Crock | #39 Dimmsdale Tales |
#40 The Past and the Furious | #41 The Fairy Beginning | #42 Fairly Odd Fairy Tales |
#43 Man's Worst Friend |