Mr. Turner: [placing an Uncle Sam hat in front of him] Don't forget your hat, son!
Timmy: Thanks, Dad! [a hand on a spring comes out of the hat and hits Timmy in the face with a pie, and Mr. and Mrs. Turner laugh. Fade to Halloween night. Timmy steps out in his Cleft costume] Oh boy! It's Halloween!
Cosmo: [putting a jack-o'-lantern in front of him] Don't forget your jack-o'-lantern!
Timmy: Thanks, loving Godparents! [the jack-o'-lantern hits him in the face with a pie, and the fairies laugh. Fade to another day. Timmy burrows out of the ground] Oh boy! It's Groundhog Day!
AJ: [giving him a present] Happy Groundhog Day, Timmy. [Timmy opens the present, revealing a groundhog inside]
Timmy: A stuffed groundhog?
AJ: And just watch what happens when it sees its shadow! [it does so, then snarls and starts attacking Timmy, who screams. Chester and AJ laugh]
Timmy: Well... at least there wasn't a pie... [the groundhog throws a pie in his face and laughs at him, then continues attacking. Timmy screams, and his friends laugh. Fade to Timmy's room on April 1. The alarm clock turns to 7:00]
Chet Ubetcha: [offscreen] Good morning, Dimmsdale! I'm Chet Ubetcha and it's April 1! That means it's April Fool's Day!
Timmy: Finally! [to the fairies] The day I get my revenge on everybody who pranked me!
Chet: And... the news this morning is... snow! And lots of it!
Timmy: Oh boy! [gets winter clothes and a sled] A snow day! No school! [sleds out of the house and onto a road. There is no snow, and friction with the road wears the sled away. Timmy comes to a stop in front of a group of people including his friends and family and Chet]
Chet: This is Chet Ubetcha saying "April Fools, Timmy Turner!" [everyone laughs at Timmy. The groundhog laughs, then sees its shadow, snarls, and starts attacking Timmy, who screams. Fade to Timmy with a joy buzzer]
Timmy: I'll show them what's funny. [to Cosmo] Everybody else plays great practical jokes on me all year long! [takes Cosmo's hand and gets electrocuted by the buzzer] But mine stink!
Cosmo: Face it, Timmy, you're no April Fool. [taking out a photo of the Fool signed "To Cosmo—stay away from me!"] He's the funniest guy in the universe! It's a photo and a restraining order!
Timmy: Maybe he could help me!
Wanda: Timmy, no! He might be the ultimate magical prankster, but he never knows when to stop!
Timmy: You're just scared because you know he's gonna help me get you guys!
Wanda: Timmy, no one has ever wished the Fool to Earth before! You don't know what could happen!
Timmy: Sure, I do. You eat a big helping of revenge pie. [to Cosmo] How do I get him here?
Cosmo: Well, like any great comedian, he needs an introduction! [makes Timmy a presenter]
Timmy: [reading cue cards Cosmo is holding] "Ladies and gentlemen... put your hands together for the comedy stylings of... [Wanda bites her fingernails] the April Fool"? [ducks. The camera pans to Fairy World. People laugh offscreen]
April Fool: [offscreen] Fairies? They've got wands and wings! What's up with that? [people laugh and clap. Fade to Uncle Knuckle's Chuckle Bunker, a comedy club] And that Jorgen Von Strangle! Have you seen that guy's forehead? They should call it a five-head! [the audience laughs]
Jorgen: Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha! Funny. Ha ha! Hey!
April Fool: It's time for the A material! Knock knock!
Jorgen: Who is there? [the Fool disappears, and the audience gasps] I fear we will never know who was knocking. But I will make it my mission in life to find out! [with a rimshot, the Fool appears in Timmy's room]
April Fool: I said "Knock knock!" [sees Timmy, Cosmo, and Wanda] Hey, this isn't Uncle Knuckle's Chuckle Bunker! What's up with that?
Cosmo: [laughing hard] "What's up with that?"
Timmy: Hi, Mister Fool! I'm Timmy Turner! It's April Fool's Day and I need to harness your special brand of comedic help!
April Fool: I got a day named after me? I don't remember signing anything! Where's my cut of the dough?
Cosmo: [laughs] Dough, shmoe! I'm Cosmo! And this is my wife, who doesn't think you're funny, Wanda! [the Fool plays a rimshot, and a bouquet appears]
April Fool: Maybe these totally harmless flowers will change your mind!
Wanda: Hey! [the Fool plays a rimshot, and a pair of hands appears and applauds him]
April Fool: Thank you, thank you... You're too kind! Hey, did you hear the one about...
Cosmo: [laughs] Chocolate syrup squirting flowers! [laughs] It's a classic! [laughs. Part of the Fool's head swells]
April Fool: Whoa! Hey. Easy. Let me get a word in edgewise. If I don't get the funny out, I get backed up! [he repeatedly takes Cosmo's hand, electrocuting him. Cosmo laughs and screams as he does]
Timmy: That was great! Can you help me prank everybody who's pranked me?
April Fool: Besides these two?
Timmy: Oh yeah.
April Fool: I dunno, kid. It's April Fool's Day. It should be all about me! Why, given all the comedic power at my disposal, should I help you? [sits on a whoopee cushion]
Timmy: I have gum.
April Fool: Is it spearmint?
Timmy: Yep.
April Fool: I'm in!
Cosmo: [laughing] He said "I'm"! [the Fool plays a rimshot, and his bus appears around everyone]
April Fool: Thank you!
Bus: [as the Fool honks its horn] I'll be here all day! I'll be here all day!
April Fool: What's up with that? [drives offscreen and crashes. Fade to Dimmsdale Elementary. Chester walks past the lockers Timmy and company are hiding in] Ready for some payback?
Timmy: Oh yeah! [the Fool plays a rimshot, and a sign appears in front of Chester]
Chester: [reading the sign] "Get your braces cleaned for free"? "Just look up"? [doing so] All right! [a magnet appears on a ceiling fan above him and attracts him by his braces. The fan starts spinning him]
Timmy: Hahahahahah! April Fool!
AJ: [wheeling a wheelbarrow with a stack of paper] Hahahahahah! That's hilarious!
Timmy: Dude, whatcha got?
AJ: This is my report on the entire history of mankind! I've been working on it practically since the day I was born!
Timmy: Bet you're too smart to fall for the old ceiling fan gag, right?
AJ: Way too smart! [the Fool plays a rimshot, and a lever and a sign appear beside AJ; reading the sign] "Pull here if you're the smartest kid in the world." Ha! Why doesn't it just say, "AJ, pull here"? [pulls the lever. A blowtorch briefly appears and burns the report] My paper! No![Timmy looks at Chester, who is screaming]
Timmy: Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! April Fool! Ha ha!
April Fool: Thank you! You've been great! [Cosmo laughs. The Fool plays a rimshot, and he and company disappear] Except you. [fade to the Turners' house]
Timmy: Ha! Did you see the look on AJ's face? Classic!
April Fool: Yeah! He was more broken than a leg in a cast! [everyone stares at him, and he frowns. A coyote howls] They can't all be gems.
Wanda: One would be nice. And do they have to be so mean?
April Fool: What's the word I'm looking for?
Timmy: Could it be... yes?
April Fool: Yes! All comedy involves a little pain! Or in this case... [Cosmo laughs, and the Fool swells] Hey, genius! I haven't said the punch line yet! If you don't let me finish the joke, I'll get comedy backup and blow myself all the way back to Fairy World.
Cosmo: Sorry. [after a long beat, he continues laughing, making the Fool swell]
Wanda: [to Timmy] Don't you think the Fool's pranks are more mean than funny?
Timmy: Cosmo thinks they're funny.
Wanda: Cosmo thinks everything is funny. Watch. [to Cosmo] Pudding.
Cosmo: [laughs; to the Fool] She said "puh" and then "ding"! [continues laughing and slaps the Fool into the floor. The annoyed Fool plays a rimshot that makes everyone disappear. Fade to the Broken Glass and Pointy Objects Factory. Everyone appears floating over sharp objects]
April Fool: Well, we're here at the broken glass and pointy objects factory. [everyone looks down, screams, and jumps away from the sharp objects]
Timmy: Why are we here?
April Fool: Look up there! [Timmy does so and sees a plane his parents are in. The two are wearing skydiving gear]
Mrs. Turner: It sure was nice of Timmy to give us these free skydiving lessons!
Mr. Turner: If he wasn't so bad at pranks, I'd be totally suspicious! Ah well...
Mr. and Mrs. Turner: [jumping out of the plane] Geronimo! [their parachutes open. The Fool plays a rimshot, turning the parachutes into pigs. Mr. and Mrs. Turner fall toward the sharp objects]
Timmy: Oh my gosh! I wish this were the rubber, trampoline, and pillow factory! [Cosmo and Wanda grant the wish]
Mr. and Mrs. Turner: [as they land on pillows] Woo-hoo! / Whee-hoo! [the pigs leave]
Mr. Turner: Quick, honey! Pull the cord for the auxiliary pigs! [they do so]
Timmy: Mr. Fool? I don't want my mom and dad hurt... just pranked! [the Fool spits out a pillow, hitting a pig offscreen]
April Fool: Hey! Restraint and compassion was not part of the deal!
Timmy: Well, the deal's off!
April Fool: I practically give you my comedic talent and you're giving me the hook? Nobody cancels the Fool!
Timmy: Dude, you are not being funny, you're being harsh!
April Fool: Don't you tell me what's funny! I am the April Fool! I'll show you funny! I'll show this whole world what funny is! [a stage hook pulls him away]
Timmy: I have a funny feeling about this.
Cosmo: That's the spirit!
Timmy: We better follow him! Come on! [Cosmo and Wanda makes themselves and Timmy disappear. Fade to where the Fool is about to launch a rocket with a giant fist on its tip. Timmy and company appear] What are you doing?
April Fool: Proving you wrong! I'm gonna close my set with a little juggling and bounce the Moon into an orbit between the Sun and the Earth and cause a new ice age! That's what's up with that!
Wanda: He's going to destroy the Earth! For the funny!
Timmy: How do we stop him?
April Fool: You can't! This is the big finish... for Earth! I'm like a hamster on a wheel at the... [Cosmo laughs, making the Fool swell]
Timmy: Comedy backup! If I can keep everyone in the world laughing so he can't get his stupid jokes out, he'll be blown back to Fairy World! I wish all the air on the Earth was full of laughing gas! [Wanda grants the wish with her and Cosmo's wands. People in Giza, in Paris, in traffic and on the Great Wall of China laugh]
April Fool: Time to moon the... [Timmy and company laugh] hey, lemme get the punch line out! The Earth! [swells and floats up] Stop it! I'm not done!
Timmy: Keep laughing! No matter how lame the joke is!
April Fool: [holding on to the rocket as he swells] I can't get out my funny! Can't... fix... comedy doubts... [Timmy launches the rocket, which takes the Fool away] Thank you! Goodnight! [explodes. The explosion changes to read "Goodnight!" Cut to Uncle Knuckle's Chuckle Bunker. The Fool appears onstage] Darn it! They got rid of me! But I'll be back! They can't stop... the funny! [Jorgen grabs him]
Jorgen: Now. [pointing his wand at the Fool] Tell me who was knock-knock-knocking!
April Fool: Can't breathe. What's up with that? [a drum falls on his head. Fade to Timmy's room]
Timmy: Man, I'm beat.
Wanda: Well, you did save the world, Timmy.
Cosmo: Yeah! So we got you a "thanks for saving the world present"! [he and Wanda make a pie appear]
Timmy: Awesome! Pie! [the snarling groundhog comes out of it. Timmy screams, and the groundhog starts attacking him]
Cosmo and Wanda: April Fools! [beat]
Wanda: Pudding.
Cosmo: What? That's not funny. [iris out on him. The end title card is shown. Fade to black]
