"Boys like comic books; girls like dolls. Boys like video games; girls like makeup. We're DIFFERENT! THAT'S WHY WE HAVE DIFFERENT BATHROOMS! (sees Veronica in the boys' bathroom because there is no girls' bathroom) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!! NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

(after Timmy sees Chester's mailbox broken on the ground and says: "Isn't that your mailbox?") "NOT AGAIN!!"

"OH NO!!!! There is a tornado, and I live in a trailer park! Oh, they told me this would happen, BUT I DIDN'T BELIEVE THEM!!!!

(disguised as a girl so he and A.J. can avoid couple-skating) "You better call me after this."

"Hey, hey, hey! Watch the hands!"

"Those tickets were impossible to get! I know, I've tried!"

A.J.: Look at all the cheese he ate in fourth grade!
Chester: No wonder he was constipated the entire year!

(in his torn Squirrel Scouts uniform, facing off with a coyote) "And now, you're about to get your "Beaten By A Chester" badge."

"The meat is more sweet when flattened on the street."

"NOOOO! I'm allergic to girls!!!!"

"Girls give me the hives!!"

"Nobody makes a fool out of Chester McBadbat! ...Except for the school system, the government, and every girl I've ever met!"

[on the magic microphone] "Luke, I'm your father... Man, this thing is cool!"

Chester: I can't believe Turner's still rolling two-wheel style.
A.J.: That's what happens when you don't grow up, huh? Get your license.
Chester: Yeah, and trade in 2-wheels for fresh, fly, 4-way transport! He's just jealous.

"I knew you were crazy; I just didn't think you were... this crazy."


"Oh, goldfish! I can totally eat them!"
Chester McBadbat

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