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The Fairly OddParents!
episode transcript
"Catman Meets The Crimson Chin"
Season №: 4
Episode №: 56A
Airdate: February 17, 2005
Transcript List

This article is a transcript of the The Fairly OddParents! episode, "Catman Meets The Crimson Chin" from Season 4, which aired on February 17, 2005.


Script[]

  • Adam West: Hey future crime-stopper, tell me your name and I'll sign this photo of me as TV's Catman!
  • Boy: I don't want your autograph!
  • Adam West: (writes) I... don't... want...
  • Woman: Help!
  • Adam West: A cry - for help! This looks like a job for...
  • Adam West: (as Catman) ...Catman! (hands kid photo) Here ya go!
  • Mom: ...Ahhhh! These prices are a crime!
  • Catman: Did somebody say crime?
  • Cop #1: I hope you know a good lawyer.
  • Timmy: Your honor, I wish my client Catman was NOT GUILTY!
  • Catman: Timmy, I don't know how you do it. (sighs) I guess the world doesn't need crime fighters with colorful costumes anymore...
  • Catman: (coughs)

(PEOPLE <SCREAM>)

  • Man: Crimson Chin! We need you and your colorful costume!
  • Theme Song: (voiceover) Here comes the Crimson Chin!
  • Crimson Chin: Your heavy metal household weaponry will never wipe away justice from this city, Iron Maiden!
  • People: Yay! Crimson Chin!
  • Timmy: Wow! They sure love their colorful crime fighters in the Crimson Chin's webtoon.
  • Wanda: But not in Dimmsdale. Adam sure seemed upset outside the courthouse!
  • Cosmo: Yeah! And he's still upset!
  • Catman: Timmy, what will I do all day if I can't fight crime? I can't lick the spoons clean at the Dairy Whip. (bitter) That would be unsanitary!
  • People: Yay!
  • Timmy: Hey! I know a place that would love a fantastic feline crime fighter like yourself!
  • Catman: Cat-tastic! How do we get there?
  • Timmy: Can I borrow your Cat-nap spray?

SFX: <SPRAY>

  • Timmy: I wish we were in the Crimson Chin's webtoon!
  • Catman: Where am I? Hey, I know you! You're Cleft, the Boy Chin Wonder!Have you seen my youthful pal, Timmy?
  • Timmy: Catman, it's me Timmy.
  • Catman: Timmy! Ah, thank heavens, I...
  • Catman: Cleft! Thank heavens! Timmy's missing and I don't know where to...
  • Catman: Dogs!!! Cats are scared of dogs!
  • Timmy: Relax! That's Clefto and Ace. Cat- friendly and faithful canine sidekicks of the one and only Crimson Chin!
  • Crimson Chin: (aside to Timmy) So you want me to take a vacay-chin and let Catman fight crime here in my webtoon?
  • Crimson Chin: Well, I could use a break from my never-ending battle for justice!
  • H2Olga: Ha-ha! It is I! H2-0lga! Get set to get dunked, Crimson Chin!
  • Catman: Your days of crime are dried up...
  • H2Olga: Super absorbent cat litter with deodorizing crystals! No! NOOO!!!
  • People: Yay! Catman!
  • Crimson Chin: Catman, I leave Chincinatti your very capable hands.
  • Catman: Paws. I have paws. Because I'm part cat.
  • Crimson Chin: Whatever. Aloha!!!

MFX: <CRIMSON CHIN SONG: "There goes the Crimson Chin!">

  • Catman: Okay, everybody. There's a new superhero in town and his name is - Catman! I just wish Timmy were here to see this...
  • Catman: Timmy!
  • Iron Maiden: Ha ha ha! The admiral's secret recipe!

SFX: <CRASH!>

  • Crowd: Crimson Chin!
  • Catman: Purrr-fect!
  • Bronze Kneecap: (evil laugh)
  • Police: (cheer)
  • Catman: Now, now. Remember I drink my milk just like you. On my knees, lapping it from a bowl next to the refrigerator.
  • Timmy: So you're ready to go home now?
  • Catman: Are you insane? No wait, that's me. I'm never leaving!
  • Catman: And if you're going to be my sidekick - whoever you are - you're gonna need a new secret identity...
  • Timmy: Wee-Wee-Kitty Boy?!?
  • Catman: I knew you'd love it! And look, you come with your own Fluffy Cycle!
  • Catman: And check out the fearsome wee wee kitty horn.

SFX: <MECHANICAL MEOW SOUND>

  • Timmy: That's it! I'm stopping this right now. Ace! Clefto! I wish... (beat) Hey, where are Ace and Clefto?
  • Catman: Ah, the mangy mongrels. I locked them away in my super liquid laser dog crate, accessible only through a super secret cat-password.
  • Timmy: The Chin isn't going to like this.
  • Theme Song: (voiceover) Here comes the Crimson Chin!
  • Crimson Chin: What in the name of all things mandibular is going on here?
  • Timmy: Chin! I can explain!
  • Crimson Chin: No need, Boo Boo Cuddly Boy. It looks like somebody's gotten too big for his whiskers!
  • Catman: Uh, your standard hero vs. hero combat rules?
  • Crimson Chin: Loser leaves town forever?
  • Catman: You got it. Let's take this outside.
  • Crimson Chin: We are outside.
  • Catman: You win round one, Chin. But let's see how you handle round two!

SFX: <CRASH>

  • Crimson Chin: Nice snappy hero banter. Me, I like to Chin-provise.
  • Timmy: Oh man, I can't look. But I have to cuz it's kinda cool!
  • Catman: One problem with ad-libbing. What do you do when the cat's got your tongue? GET IT?
  • Referee: Three, Two, One - you're out. Catman wins!
  • Crimson Chin: Easy citizens. I'm just like you. I too go to the bathroom in a box, in the corner of the laundry room.
  • Timmy: Chin! No! Don't go!
  • Crimson Chin: I'm okay, Kitty Kitty Bang Bang. I lost, fair and square. If this town wants a cat-based hero instead of a chin-based one, I won't argue. Hey, do you have 50 cents in that girly girly outfit?
  • Timmy: Oh my gosh! He's so upset, he forgot he could fly off in a huff! Oh man, I've got to get Cosmo and Wanda free and fix this wish...but first I gotta climb this really big windy hill...almost there...yep, still climbing... here I go.
  • Timmy: A super secret password huh? What password would somebody as deep and complicated as Catman choose as his password? (beat) C.A.T.
  • Wanda: (as Ace) Let me guess, we need to create a super villain that will get the Chin and Catman on the same crime-fighting team!
  • Timmy: Something Catman can't stop alone. Something he hates and that he'll need the Chin's help to defeat.
  • Cosmo: (as Clefto) Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
  • Timmy and Wanda: You're thinking?
  • Cosmo: Yeah! I was thinking big mechanical dog.
  • Timmy and Wanda: (awkward) Big... Mechanical... Dog?
  • People: (scream)
  • Catman: Evil robot villain, you're not welcome here...
  • Catman: Ahhh! Nice doggy! Nice big robot doggy that I'm ascared of!
  • Timmy: Now, let's see what Dogzilla has in his utility belt.
  • Timmy: And the only thing cats hate more than fleas is a bath!
  • Catman: Must... lick... self... dry... might take awhile...
  • Cosmo: Wow, look at all the places he can reach with his cat tongue.
  • Wanda: So when does the Chin come in?
  • Timmy: Right about now.

(Dogzilla lets out a mechanical howl as crowd screams.)

  • Crimson Chin: I don't understand it! What else can I do to make this beast heel?
  • Catman: Perhaps teamwork. But I can't do it - I'm scared of dogs!
  • Crimson Chin: Right, because dogs chase cats. Quick Catman. Run. Run to the park like the little kitten you are.
  • Catman: Catman doesn't like this plan.
  • Crimson Chin: But Dogzilla will love - this!
  • Crimson Chin: Here boy - fetch!
  • People: (cheer)
  • Catman: I don't understand it! They shunned you and you came back anyway.
  • Crimson Chin: That's because great heroes don't fight for fame or adulation. (sighs autograph) Here ya go. (back to Catman) You fight for justice.
  • Catman: And that's why I need to go back to the place that shunned me and save it from crime whether they want me to or not.
  • Timmy: And they don't.
  • Catman: For whenever someone in Dimmsdale calls for help but doesn't want me to help them, I will answer that call anyway. (beat) And then I'll call Timmy.
  • Timmy: Your honor, I wish my client Catman was NOT GUILTY!
  • Catman: Timmy, I don't know how you do it. I wish Cleft were here to see this.
  • Catman: Cleft!
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