Merry Wishmas/Quotes


 * Timmy: I didn't get what I wanted for Christmas!
 * Mr. Turner: Well, join the club, mister! I asked for two thousand gallons of nog, but instead all I got was this set of golf clubs, an SUV, the Hope Diamond and a talking horse!
 * Talking Horse: H-h-h-hey, Timmy.
 * Mr. Turner: And this stupid sled! Or as I like to call it, firewood! [throws the sled into the fireplace]
 * Timmy: No!!
 * Mrs. Turner: [holds up the shovel and the rock salt] Timmy, I think your presents are wonderful and that Santa was very thoughtful...
 * [scene changes to Timmy standing outside his house with the shovel and rock salt]
 * Mrs. Turner: ...to your dad and me!


 * Timmy: I wanna give every kid in Dimmsdale one day after Christmas wish.
 * Wanda: What are we suppose to do, poof up a magical wish coupon good for one wish?
 * Cosmo: Yeah, and deliver them to every kid in town like some kind of magic mailmen?
 * [Timmy just smirks and the scene changes to Cosmo and Wanda dressed as mailmen]
 * Wanda: [to Cosmo] You had to say magic mailman?


 * A.J.: I wish I had a ten thousand terrabyte super computer!
 * Computer: [in a monotone voice] Merry Wishmas, A.J.
 * A.J.: That's kinda creepy.


 * Mr. Turner: Or I could wish I was Nog-Man, the caped crusader of Nog! Yup, going with Nog-Man. Nog nog and away!


 * Timmy: I don't want the world to forget about Santa!
 * Wanda: Don't worry Timmy, nobody could ever forget about Santa!
 * Cosmo: Santa who? Santa Monica? Santa Barbara? Santa Clarita?


 * Timmy: Where'd you get that book anyway?
 * Cosmo: Under your tree. It's a real page-turner, I can't wait to find out who the killer is!
 * [then later...]
 * Cosmo: [reading] So on that very first Wishmas, Santa, elves and spouse. Said Timmy killed Christmas, and moved into his house! [sees Timmy] Ahh, you're the killer!
 * Timmy: I just wanted a sled!!


 * Santa: I need more milk.
 * Nog-Man: [bursts through the wall with Nog-Dog] Why drink milk when you can enjoy thick, artery-clogging nog!


 * Nog-Man: Oooh, my inbox is clogged on the Nog Blog, Nog-Dog! [the screen switches to a dehydrated Santa Claus] Great Scott, a parched man who needs the rejuvenating of Nog! Quick! To the Nog-Mobile!


 * Timmy: What's the book say?
 * Cosmo: When Timmy realized Santa wasn't going away, they all sucked it up until Thanksgiving Day.
 * [later, on Thanksgiving Day]
 * Mrs. Claus: Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
 * Timmy: This book is incredibly accurate.
 * Mrs. Claus: Now, who wants milk?
 * Nog-Man: Milk?! Loser. Who wants nog?! [grabs two cartons of nog off his utility belt and sprays them on Mrs. Claus]
 * Mrs. Claus: Oh it is on. [tackles Nog-Man]


 * Mrs. Turner: An entire year of cookies and nog for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Ahhh! I'm sick of cookies! [slams the table] I'm sick of radio contests! [takes a radio and throws it, then jumps out the door and laughs crazily while grabbing a reindeer and riding off]
 * Timmy: Well, there goes my mom with Santa's only ride to the North Pole.


 * Timmy: I wanna celebrate Christmas, not Wishmas!
 * Santa: Well, Timmy. Seems like this year you're the only one.
 * Timmy: Oh yeah, what about this?! [whips out a letter]
 * [Santa puts on some glasses as a girlish voice reads the letter: "Dear Santa, I believe in you. I can't imagine Christmas without you. You're the greatest most jolliest Christmas hero ever" Then Santa lowers the letter to reveal that it was Timmy who was reading it]


 * Wanda: Any last wish before Jorgen gets here?
 * Timmy: Yes. I wish I had a big butterfly net and a remote controlled trapdoor.
 * [Wanda poofs them up. Then Timmy uses the butterfly net to trap Cosmo and Wanda]
 * Cosmo: Wow, didn't see that coming.


 * Santa: Let's turn this Wishmas tears into Christmas cheers!
 * Elf: But Santa, it's impossible. THe reindeer took off, we sold the sled to buy cookie mix and we ain't got no Fairy World magic
 * Santa: Nothing's impossible if you believe!
 * Nog-Man: I believe, Santa! You can use my Nogmobile to deliver toys.
 * Santa: Can it fly?
 * Nog-Man: Er...Not in the sky, no.
 * Mrs. Turner: I believe too! I have returned so that the reindeer may pull Santa's Nog-Mobile and so he can take Mrs. Claus and her cookies far away!


 * Timmy: This year we need to figure out what we can give!
 * A.J.: Right! Because Christmas isn't a coupon that comes in a mailbox.
 * Computer: [monotone] It's a feeling that comes in your heart.
 * A.J.: Still creepy.


 * Cosmo: And what happened then? Well, in Dimmsdale they say. That the kids gave the entire toy mountain away!


 * Mrs. Turner: Hmmm, you know, Nog-Man. You look a lot like my husband. Is it possible you're-
 * Nog-Man: Nog fog! [He sprays Nog fog on Mrs. Turner and she faints] She must never know.


 * Cosmo: [reading from the book] So next time you're blue on the day after Christmas.
 * Santa: Give something away and have your own Merry Wishmas!
 * Timmy: Wait a minute, you wrote the book and put it under my tree didn't you? But how could you possibly know all this was gonna happen and that I'd learn a lesson?
 * Santa: Dude, I'm Santa. Ho ho ho!